Item #: SCP-XXX
Object Class: Euclid
Special Containment Procedures: Due to this involvement, Foundation personnel are strictly prohibited from gambling on NCAA football games.
Description: SCP-XXX is an entity of unknown nature. Though its appearance varies, it has most often taken the form of a large mass of branches intersecting three cubes. It typically does not interact with physical matter, though it is can disintegrate objects by passing through them. Extended exposure to SCP-XXX causes gradual mental degradation, eventually resulting in insanity. Beyond this, it seems capable of causing moderate alterations in local reality. The full extent of SCP-XXX's abilities is currently unknown.
SCP-XXX was apparently brought to this world by Roy Wilson, a former football coach for the Mississippi River College Moccasins with Serpent's Hand connections. It is believed that he summoned SCP-XXX due to frustration with the team's persistent losing record. According to his recovered journals, the entity is bound to serve and assist the Moccasins until they win the BCS National Championship Game, thereby becoming the champion of that season of NCAA football. What happens when this condition is met is unknown, but preventative measures are being undertaken.
To bring about its release, SCP-XXX aids the Moccasins and hinders any opposing teams. Initially, it attempted to do this via very direct methods, such as killing or driving insane members of opposing teams. When this failed due to Foundation interference, SCP-XXX turned to more subtle means, including targeting opposing coaches and inducing computer errors to wipe out funding for other college football teams. As the ritual binding SCP-XXX is believed to be nullified should its conditions become impossible to fulfill, it is speculated that SCP-XXX is attempting to destroy the Bowl Championship Series entirely to ensure its release.
SCP-XXX came to the attention of the Foundation after the unexplained insanity of Mr. Wilson and a series of similar incidents affecting players on teams that played against the Moccasins. Mr. Wilson was brought into custody and events extrapolated from his more lucid testimony and the contents of his journal, whereupon
Recovered documents from the journal of Roy Wilson. Extraneous material omitted.
January 8, ████
The Moccasins will win when hell freezes over.
Another season past, and our best chance for years squandered. 7-5. Better, but not even close to good enough. And with Vernon and Rhodes graduating, we lose half our defense. There’s no way we do this well next season, even if Tanner lives up to his potential. I’ve done all I can. I want to tell these kids that we’re going to do it next season, we’re going to go all the way, but I can’t lie to them. I can’t lie to myself.
January 18, ████
I have a very bad idea. When I was younger, I associated with some, for lack of a better word, sorcerers. I even once tried my hand with their magic a little and actually showed some talent at it. Perhaps I could turn to that? There’s probably some terrible price, but I’d do anything for the team.
February 1, ████
I spoke to an old friend of mine the other day. It was good to talk to him again, though I am reminded why I broke off with him and the others. I did the rite to take me to the Library, and believe me, I have never seen such a beautiful place in my life. The way the filigreed iron curled around the stone pillars. I can’t do it justice. I’m no poet, just a coach. I got some books of summoning magic. I’ll start small and work up. Surely something can help us.
February 4, ████
Nothing. Well, that’s not quite true. The imps and tempters I called up (it’s easier than I believed possible) promised much, but I’m canny enough to see their lies for what they are. They can’t help me. It’s like that old joke where the genie says that peace in the Middle East would be easier than the Saints winning the Super Bowl. The Library must have something more powerful than this, something that can restore the Moccasins to their former glory. It’s possible, I know it.
February 8, ████
Got one last book. They didn’t want to let me check this one out, but I insisted. About to try the summoning. If it doesn’t work, whoever finds this, tell Maureen I loved her.
Believed to be February 8, ████
Dread thing rose but bound BOUND BOUND
it shall serve!!
my brain hurts like a sick silk nail
UNTIL we win the feathered eye will turn its gaze to the world
What have I done? It hurts to think. hurts like the blood of the skies that burns all when the feathered eye stares
Stop it. Stop them. Stop me.
When the Moccasins win, hell will freeze over.
Item #: SCP-1000
Object Class: Euclid
Special Containment Procedures: Instances of SCP-1000 are to be contained in a secure storage unit when not being tested. Only Class D personnel are permitted to read from any active instance of SCP-1000. In the event of accidental exposure, Class A amnesiacs have proven effective in fully reversing the effects.
Any theories proposed by an active document in SCP-1000 found among civilian populations are to be subverted or quashed. If the theory has not spread beyond a localized geographic area, administration of Class B amnesiacs to all affected is to be considered adequate. If the theory has spread to the internet, or has a particularly spread out or hard to locate group of believers, Foundation infiltrators are to join the following and attempt to shift the fringe theory it is built around to something further from the instance of SCP-1000 that is its source. Additionally, newly appearing fringe theories are to be investigated to ensure that they do not stem from an uncontained instance of SCP-1000.
Description: SCP-1000 consists of a collection of documents that each take the form of a bound notebook. Each has a glyph on the cover containing a number expressed in roman numerals. Though the glyph is the same between all instances of SCP-1000 yet recovered, no two have had the same number, leading to the classification of each instance of SCP-1000 by the number on the cover. For a complete description of recovered instances of SCP-1000, please see Document 1000-1.
Every instance of SCP-1000 argues in favor of some theory, often one that seems implausible or illogical. However, anyone who reads from an SCP-1000 document becomes convinced of the veracity of what is written within. This does not seem to be a memetic effect, as copies of an instance of SCP-1000 are not any more persuasive than a mundane argument of similar plausibility. After initial exposure, the theory spreads normally.
If sufficient persons believe the theory expressed in an SCP-1000 document, a gradual CJ-Class restructuring event occurs so that that theory becomes true. The threshold for this to occur is currently unknown, but is believed to vary between instances. If the number of followers of a theory drops below the required number before the CJ-Class restructuring is complete, the effects reverse themselves until normalcy is restored.
Of note is that certain instances of SCP-1000 express theories that seem to be accurate. This suggests that there have been a number of completed CJ-Class restructurings instigated by SCP-1000. These documents are to be considered inactive, with all others being considered active.
Complete list of contained instances of SCP-1000:
SCP-1000-2 — Describes a plot by pharmaceutical companies to brainwash the population through releasing chlorine into the water supply. Successfully averted by shifting the theory so that the government is the culprit and the chemical used is fluorine. Classified active.
SCP-1000-5 — Describes how former President Richard Nixon wiretapped his office and sabotaged his opponents' campaigns. After failure to subvert or quash the theory, CJ-Class restructuring occurred. Classified inactive.
SCP-1000-8 — Argues that radio usage is causing the catastrophic destruction of the ionosphere. Attempts to quash theory successful. First instance of SCP-1000 recovered. Classified active.
SCP-1000-9 — Level five clearance required. All personnel with sufficient clearance may see Document 1000-20 for further details.
SCP-1000-10 — Claims that Earth has been repeatedly visited by advanced aliens in disk-shaped craft. Attempts to quash theory unsuccessful. Subversion attempts ongoing. Classified active.
SCP-1000-18 — Claims that an entity similar to SCP-███ is responsible for the ██████ murders in ████ ███, █████. Unclear if CJ-Class restructuring has already occurred. Attempts to quash theory ongoing as precautionary measure. Tentatively classified active.
SCP-1000-22 — Describes how the continents are on massive plates that drift around the mantle. Despite the increase in earthquakes this theory would cause, the geological effects have been deemed beneficial to long-term human survival. Theory propagation authorized. CJ-Class restructuring ongoing. Classified active. No efforts are to be made to prevent progression.
SCP-1000-25 — Argues that mercury exposure causes brain damage. Discovered well after presumed CJ-Class restructuring. Classified inactive.
[LEVEL 5 CLEARANCE REQUIRED]
SCP-1000-9 describes the Foundation. It is classified inactive. Contrary to what its file says, SCP-1000-8 was not the first to be contained. For as long as our records go back, they say we have always had SCP-1000-9 in containment, despite the anachronism of having it before ████. SCP-1000-9 exactly describes the Foundation as we were, but it is not binding. The moral failures and the inefficiencies of the organization described in SCP-1000-9 are things we can and have moved beyond. The Foundation will save the world from things like that which created it.
With thanks to NightStar76, whose Radio Is Bad For You inspired this
Item #: SCP-XXX
Object Class: Keter
Special Containment Procedures: Due to its nonphysical nature, containment of SCP-XXX is currently limited to suppression of knowledge of its existence, and efforts to counteract its effects. Foundation contacts in major financial institutions are to watch for market patterns known to have been previously induced by SCP-XXX, and work to prevent their development. In absence of a clear move by SCP-XXX, they are to promote general economic stability. Should any individual unaffiliated with the containment of SCP-XXX find evidence of its existence, they are to be administered Class-A amnesiacs.
Description: SCP-XXX is an abstract entity that exists within the stock market. Though it is in no way able to interact with the physical world, it is capable of directly manipulating the price of securities, and seems to favor conditions of economic instability. In such conditions, it seems to be able to more strongly influence prices, thus creating a positive feedback loop.
To create the environment it prefers, SCP-XXX creates or artificially inflates bubbles, and may hasten their downfall in the case of across-the-board growth. It also acts to defend itself by lowering the values of investments of groups working to promote market stability. It is unclear if SCP-XXX is sentient, though given the mode of its existence, the question may not be a meaningful one.
SCP-XXX was brought to the attention of the Foundation by the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission, which had detected a massive fraud in the stock market that they believed could only have been caused by unlikely collusion among hundreds of business leaders or an organization maliciously affecting stock prices. Having been unable to locate the party responsible through conventional means, they approached the Foundation for assistance.
After extensive and fruitless investigation, the Foundation, with the cooperation of the SEC and its equivalents in other countries, shut down global security trading for two hours in a publicized move. Contrary to expected behavior for a cabal, program, or meme, the source of the market destabilization did not take advantage of this suspension, prompting Senior Researcher Wu to suggest that the entity responsible may somehow reside within the market itself. Further research has supported this conclusion, and consequently the entity's classification as SCP-XXX.
Addendum XXX-7: The recent attempt to contain SCP-XXX in a Foundation-controlled, low stability simulated market may not have been successful, but we still learned two important, if sobering, things. First, we can't contain SCP-XXX if continue to think about it as though it had a physical existence, no more than we can contain a meme by locking it in a box. If we present it with a new market it hasn't touched yet, it will spread to that market, at no penalty to its ability to influence any other. Second, based on the fact that SCP-XXX amplified the instabilities in our little market until it collapsed, we have to assume that SCP-XXX will show a similar lack of restraint in influencing the global markets. SCP-XXX cannot be allowed to grow any further, if we wish to avoid a worldwide financial meltdown.
~ Senior Researcher Wu
Addendum XXX-24: Anomalies detected in Foundation investments suggest that SCP-XXX may be targeting the Foundation.