Item #: SCP-3049
Object Class: Euclid
Special Containment Procedures:
SCP-3043 is a phenomenon occurring to an individual employed as a junior software developer at a specific position at the company of REDACTED. The exact position that activates a SCP-3043 changes over time. An individual subjected to a SCP-3043 manifestation will be gradually altered to resemble a person that was originally employed at REDACTED in 2002. This person will be referred to as the phenotype of SCP-3043 from this point on.
The current active position in the software technology company of REDACTED should be filled by an individual matching the phenotype at the time of his employment as closely as possible.
- Gender: Male
- Age: 27
- Weight: 107 kg
- Height: 185 cm
- Wears glasses. Prefers casual clothes
- Lives as close to 1 hour and 23 minutes by train to REDACTED as possible
- Lacks close relatives or friends
- Bachelors degree within computer science
At least one reserve to this individual should be available at all times, in case anything happens to the current SCP-3043 subject. When a SCP-3043 subject leaves the company, his position should be filled immediately. If the position that manifests SCP-3043 has changed, the replacement should be relocated to the new active position.
One agent should be stationed within the company to monitor the SCP-3043 subject. This person should not be hired under his real name, should not be provided any salary from the company, and should not himself sign any employment contract. The private life of the SCP-3043 subject should be monitored, with any discrepancies in documentation surrounding the SCP-3043 subject adjusted.
SCP-3043-B is an empty office that the phenotype and a team of three others shared back in 2002. It is no longer in use at the company, and people employed at the company seem unable to remain aware of its existence.
A manifestation of SCP-3043 starts within two weeks of a person being hired and includes the following
The commute. Irregardless of the SCP-3043 subjects actual place of living, the subject will start to take longer and longer to get to work, until he takes the train for 1 hour and 23 minutes. Trains the subject takes may start to stop at or pass stations they should not, the time the train takes may be altered, and the path the train takes may become inconsistent with available maps of the railway network, all dependent on how far the subjects original place of living is from being 1 hour and 23 minutes away from his company by train.
Physical and mental alterations. Unless the subject already has glasses, his eyesight will deteriorate until he requires them. The subject will start to loose control of his eating habits, either over eating or under eating until his weight matches the phenotype. The subject will become morose and passive. The subject will start to cut off himself or herself from friends and family, often citing his commute and lack of free time. The subject will start to use the phrase “13 hour and forty minute work day” both at work and in his private life, in addition to the phrase “1 and a half hour of free time every day.” The subject will spend his or her weekends sleeping in, regardless of prior interests or lifestyle.
Alterations to documentation. On occasion, documents or personal belongings documenting the subjects life such as photos, letters, even identification will be altered to refer to the phenotype. The most common change is the alteration of dates to refer to 2002 or 2003. Other changes that have been noted have included the alteration of photos to depict the wrong people, alteration of sms and letters, and the alteration of small mementos. These alterations are partial and and noticeable, and should be prioritized while covering up a manifestation of SCP-3043.
In later stages of an SCP-3043 manifestation, the subject will move to SCP3043-C. No one employed at the company will take notice off this. The subject will walk in as always, but will go to the empty room, bringing his work computer to work at the same project the phenotype worked on back on 2002.
Four to ten days after a subject of the SCP-3043 manifestation moves into SCP3043-C he will start to imagine the team mates of the phenotypes original team. He will converse with these people as if they were present, as if he was the phenotype.
The project of the original SCP-3043 phenotype lasted for nine months. Those subjected to a SCP-3043 manifestation usually remains within the last stages between two to four years. They then either find a new employment or are remembered long enough to get fired. No SCP-3043 subject has to date finished their project. Physical and personality changes of a SCP-3043 subject do not revert after they leave the company though subjects have been observed to slowly move away from the phenotype over time. The memetic and reality bending properties of the manifestation seem to cease.
SCP-3043 subjects often have difficulty finding new work due to the hole in their career path, their lack of references and their lack of applicable skills. Most skills picked up during the manifestation are obsolete. SCP-3043 subjects often end up long term unemployed, with a difficulty in reconnecting with old friends, or forming new relationships
The original SCP-3043 phenotype is doing well for himself. During a covert interview he described his first 'real job' as '…horrible. It was like carving out a piece of my soul and leaving it to rot'. No anomalous properties of the original phenotype has been discovered.
The alterations of an SCP-3043 manifestation are often partial, and becomes easier to discover the more drastic the changes. Of specific note is one instance in 2006, when an individual living only a few blocks from the offices of REDACTED manifested SCP-3034. The ensuing non eucledian commute brought SCP-3043 to foundation attention, led to an emergency termination of the active SCP-3034 subject, the administration of class C amnesiacs to twenty seven individual witnesses, and the current containment procedures.
Item #: SCP-7777
Object Class: Euclid
Special Containment Procedures:
SCP-7777 is kept within a reinforced outside enclosure at site 19. It should be fed two kg of sawdust twice daily, in addition to any amount of water. An animal trainer should be designated to care for SCP-7777. Only its designated trainer, or personnel authorized by its designated trainer should be allowed within its enclosure. In the event of a containment breach guards should aim for the legs and take down SCP-7777 from a distance.
SCP-7777 is a South Carolina Farm Dining table, white. It is animate and shows animal behaviour not unlike that of a large mammal. It is aggressive and will attack and attempt to ram or trample individuals it perceives as a threat. The object weights 532 kilograms and has a durability similar to steel. It still appears to be made of wood. Caution is advised.
SCP-7777 was retrieved by Field Agent Aaron Tremor in 08/10/13 from a two story building in Bellingham, Washington. Agent Tremor was investigating a trace on a suspect cell of the Global Occult Coalition. The building was indicated as a possible target. Upon arrival at the residence agent Tremor found the entire building contained objects similar to SCP-7777, including not only furniture but also appliances, electronics, textiles, carpets, lamps, kitchenware, windows and doors. While awaiting a containment MTF dispatch outside of the premises, Agent Tremor was attacked by members of the suspected cell and took refuge within the building. All furniture inside proceeded to panic. During the chaos the suspected cell firebombed the building and blocked off all entrances. Agent Tremor sustained broken bones in both legs, several bruises, and massive internal bleeding. He eventually managed to get on top of the SCP-7777 and "ride" it out into the suspect cell members at the residence main entrance, killing two and critically wounding one other. At this point the MTF arrived at the scene, causing the remaining members to flee. Local firefighting services arrived minutes later, just as SCP-7777 was contained. Due to structural damage from the fire and the anomalous objects inside, the building partially collapsed at this point. All anomalous objects remaining inside were destroyed in the fire. MTF members report furniture screaming as it burned. The remains of the owners were later found in the wreckage. The fire fighters at the scene were provided amnesics, and a cover story of drug deal gone bad was devised for the papers. Agent Tremor received emergency medical care and an official reprimand. It is to this date unknown how or why the owners of the building obtained so many anomalous objects.
Approximately one week after its arrival at site 19 SCP-7777 broke free of its containment cell, trampled through site 19, severely wounding the leg of one guard and trampling a wooden chair into pieces before feeding on the remains. SCP-7777 was brought back into temporary containment while its containment procedures where revised.
Okay so random notes for the video.
What we have here is really two or more stories.
The first is of the foundation actually for once tracking down and capturing a creator of an scp that can repeat the creation.
Then there's the foundation capturing a chaos insurgency agent, and him subverting their agents.
Then there is the story of a foundation researcher defecting, attempting to join awcy, and awcy killing him for his troubles.
In order to simplify, maybe pick one of them and focus on that one.
Item #: SCP-7777(placeholder)
Object Class: Safe
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-7777 and SCP-7777-1 is to be stored in a secure database placed at Site 23. SCP-7777-2 is to be stored in the middle of a eleven meter wide and three meter high locked container at Site 23. No personnel should be allowed within five meters of SCP-7777-2.
SCP-7777 is a 1:22 minute long video of a man shaving. The man is Caucasian, adult and blonde. His eyes are brown and he appears fit. He looks directly into the camera. After 43 seconds any person watching the video will have incisions similar to razor wounds appear along their throat. The placement of these incisions correspond to the location the man is shaving. The viewer will not notice these wounds, any blood, or any pain until the video ends, at which point their throat will be severely damaged. If given immediate emergency care a 10% chance of survival has been estimated. This chance is increased significantly if the person does not watch the video in its entirety. The video itself does not contain any mental compulsion to keep watching, and any mention of the wounds to the afflicted person will make him immediately aware of them. Note that entering into shock is a common side effect of watching SCP-7777. Individuals noticing their wounds also often panic and as a result may not cooperate with attempts at providing aid.
The video was discovered on a YouTube account at ██/██/ ██. It had been uploaded for █ days before it was intercepted by Foundation and removed from the site. The Foundation also suppressed knowledge of afflicted individuals as per standard protocol. In ██/██/ ██ the Foundation identified the man in the video, a Russian national by the name of █████ ████████. Three weeks later Foundation agents apprehended him in an apartment in Moscow. During his transit and incarceration he attempted to commit suicide on three consecutive occasions and was put under suicide watch.
Addendum 1: Interview Log
Interviewer: Researcher Bailey
Bailey: "Please state name and age."
█████: "Kind of useless isn't it? You already know that."
Bailey: "Please state name and age, for the record."
█████: " █████ ████████, thirty two."
Bailey: "Very well. Tell us about the video."
█████ [Shrugs] "It was mostly a testing run. Wanted to check how tight you people's grip was on online distributing channels. You were slower than we thought."
Bailey: "We managed to track you down and bring you here."
█████ [Shrugs] "Still pretty slow."
Bailey: "So you confess to being a member of The Chaos Insurgency?"
█████: "Sure, why not?"
Bailey: "And you confess to having participated in the creation of an anomalous video?"
█████: "I didn't just participate in it, I created it. Tell you
Addendum 2: Incident 7777-CETA: 36 hours after this interview █████ was found dead in his cell. Cause of death was later determined to be cyanide poisoning. Around the time of discovery SCP-7777-1 was uploaded to Foundation servers from the account of Researcher Bailey. Twenty minutes later Researcher Bailey was officially reported as missing. Records show he accessed and copied a number of files on the Group of Interest referred to as AWCY before his disappearance.
Addendum 3: SCP-7777-1:
SCP-7777-1 is a 1:04 video featuring a still image of a cartoon character from the show ██████████████. After five seconds people watching the video starts to bleed from their eyes. They will not notice this effect. After 52 seconds their eyes will become damaged as if pierced by a sharp object at least four millimetres thick. Though blinded, they appear not to notice, continuing watching the video until its completion. At 1:00 the still image is replaced by the words "Are We Cool Yet?" superimposed over a black screen. Blinded individuals do not become aware of this change.
Four months after Incident 7777-CETA Foundation Agents tracked Researcher Bailey to a warehouse in Charleston, South Carolina. They breached the warehouse and engaged a suspected member of AWCY. The member managed to escape. Within the warehouse they located a small workshop, several tools, a functioning computer connected to a printer, a printed out note (See Addendum #4) and SCP-7777-2.
Addendum 5: SCP-7777-2:
SCP-7777-2 is the corpse of researcher Bailey, crucified by means of thin metal wire affixed to his wrists and ankles, across a 2.8 meter high iron cross constructed from the scrap metal of three different metal coat racks. The corpse is naked, has had it's eyes plucked out, forks driven into its hands and feet, it's testicles removed and put into its mouth, and the word NO carved into its chest with a meat knife found at the same location as SCP-7777-2.
Anyone approaching to within five meters of SCP-7777-2 starts to bleed from the hands and feet in a manner similar to stigmata. The bleeding will increase exponentially while they remain within five meters. Typically a healthy adult will bleed out within eight minutes. Death usually occur earlier, within four to six minutes after first exposure. Subjects exposed to the effect has reported an intense feeling of religious euphoria. A person prostrating themselves before SCP-7777-2 will not perish from blood loss until they cease, even if completely emptied of blood.
Addendum 6: Note #1
you're beating down the door not much timw
lok this sucks, it was a bad idea, I hate it, I was going to redo it but you're already here don't have time
just destroy it, its so bad I know you don't do that often and we don't see eye to eye but i promise you this is just a wip, man im so
This note was retrieved from the same location as SCP-7777-2. It was still being printed when agents breached the warehouse SCP-7777-2 was located in.
Item #: SCP-XXX
Object Class: Safe
Special Containment Procedures:
While not being tested, all instances of SCP-XXX should be kept in a standard security locker. Researchers wishing to conduct tests on SCP-XXX should contact Dr Thorns.
SCP-XXX is to be divided into two groups of ten(10) instances, one group of fourteen(14) instances, and twenty groups of one(1) instance. The group of fourteen instances should be kept in a standard security locker, and used for research and testing on SCP-XXX. The other groups should be reserved for foundation emergency supply kits. These kits can be recquisitioned freely for those with level 4 clearance, and on a case by case basis by those with a level 3 clearance. Any D-Class addicted to an instance of SCP-XXX should be terminated as soon as any tests on him have finished. Any other operative addicted to an instance of SCP-xxx shall have their mandatory psych eval reviewed for signs of depression, desperation, or abnormal levels of calm. Their supervising officer will, on a case to case basis, decide the level of security risk such an operative poses.
SCP-XXX is a box of fruit flavoured chewing gum. Each piece of gum will be referred to as an instance. The packaging indicate an original content of one hundred instances. Currently, fiftyfour(54) pieces remain.
While chewed on continously for the majority of a day, one instance of SCP-XXX will provide all nourishment the body needs, including water, vitamins, and all other necessary nutrients required to keep a human being fed. This intake will be adapted to fit the general profile of a balanced diet for a male, aged 20-50, who remains physically active. Tests have shown an inevitable improvement in weight, blood pressure, blood sugar, and general fitness levels of persons using SCP-XXX fitting this profile. One instance of SCP-XXX lasts for between nine to eleven month.
Should a person use SCP-XXX for over 23 minutes, he will become unable to accept any other forms of nourishment. No known cure for this condition is present at this time.
Analysis of SCP-XXX instances reveal normal ingredients that would be expected within fruit flavored chewing gum, in addition to several abnormal ingredients. These include:
One piece of Strawberry Flavoured Gum: High quantities of quicksilver, in addition to acryl based spray paint.
One piece of Strawberry Flavoured Gum: Microscopic fragmens of glass and wood.
One piece of banana flavoured gum: Small quantities of fecal matter, ethanol, and ink.
One piece of Ananas Flavoured Gum: High quantities of cyanide.
No patterns to these abnormal ingredients have been established.
To obtain the full effect of SCP-XXX, at least sixteen hours of continous chewing each day is recommended. Because each instance dry per the normal rates of gum, it is adviced to store an instance of SCP-XXX within a liquid container when not in use.
Currently two operatives within the foundation are addicted to SCP-XXX. Agent ██████ (4 years) and Dr ████ (4 months, 3 weeks). Of note is that Dr ████ requested use of SCP-XXX while fully aware of its effects.
Finished For Now:
Item #: SCP-xxxx
Object Class: Euclid
Special Containment Procedure:
"SCP-xxxx should be contained in a padded cell with no less than three(3) audio recording devices installed in the walls. Batteries should be changed weekly. SCP-xxxx should be medicated using document '23-A' and a therapist meeting should be provided once(1) every week. SCP-xxxx should always be referred to in person as 'Mr Smith', as referring to it by any other means throws it into a panic/rage state. This have resulted in moderate injuries to it and research personnel, and have seriously impeded attempts to interview the subject and keep its mental state stable. Foundation personnel wishing to visit or make use of SCP-xxxx for experiments must seek permission with its currently designated therapist. In the event of a containment breach, immediate termination of SCP-xxxx is authorised. Records of SCP-xxxx should be reviewed every month, and at least six backups should be kept in different locations at all times.
Description SCP-xxxx is a a 47 year old male of African American descent. Unless constantly reaffirming its existence, SCP-xxxx slowly fades out of reality. The effect manifests in a gradual decrease in the ability to perceive SCP-xxxx by any known means until it eventually vanishes. This has been known to affect objects and personnel in SCP-xxxx immediate vicinity. The Foundation have been unable to determine the extent of this ability to a satisfiable degree but current experimental data suggests it is localised to SCP-xxxx. The subject claims to be a construction worker. It further claims its anomalous properties arose in a gradual fashion after the death of its wife and children in a car accident. During this time it developed several coping mechanism to keep its slowly degrading condition under a modicum of control. Habits such as repeating its name, checking its pulse, keeping itself talking to others, drawing and writing descriptions of itself on its body and surrounding surfaces and keeping recordings of its voice going while sleeping all developed over time. Currently the Foundation have found no records of subjects stated wife, children, house, car or extended family ever having existed. There have been no car accident at the given date, no graves could be found, the provided address has never been in use, and all relevant social security numbers remain unassigned in what appears to be due to computer error. The only evidence of SCP-xxxx existence consists of a few co-workers remembering it, but accounts vary widely. As an example, construction worker ██████ ████████ described as a "close friend" were unable to recall subjects skin color with certainty. As a result of the mental stress subject is under, it has developed a severe cause of bi-polar depression, in addition to chronic sleep deprivation. Its anomalous condition continue to deteriorate. By current estimates, Foundation will have lost it by 20██-██
Addendum-1 Please note the containment procedures only calls for referring to SCP-xxxx as 'Mr Smith' while in its vicinity, and this only due to its sensitive mental state. At all other times it should be referred to using its SCP designation. It has been noted personnel assigned to SCP-xxxx have repeatedly failed to do so. Further violations will be severely reprimanded. Keep it professional. -Director ████
Test procedure: SCP-XXX was restrained and made unable to speech. Researcher assistant Reiner and Dieter were in the room and kept observing subject. Dr Thorns supervised from an adjacent room.
10m:12s : Unable to recognize subject as SCP-xxxx.
14m:32s : Unable to recognize clothes of SCP-xxxx
19m:07s : unable to identify SCP-xxxx race.
24m:00s : unable to identify what SCP-xxxx is currently doing.
35m:46s : unable to identify how SCP-xxxx is sitting.
39m:41s : unable to identify anything save the presence of a humanoid creature in the room.
Research Assistant Dieter started a recording at this point, consisting of SCP-xxxx describing himself. Subject returned to a describable state, curled up in a fetus like position on the floor. No sign of the restraints or the chair subject was placed in. SCP-xxxx was provided Class B amnesiacs after experiment. Subsequent tests showed similar results, with a minor variation in timing, tending downwards.
Test Conclusion: It would appear SCP-xxxx condition is slowly getting worse, and that it can affect others than itself. - Dr Thorns
Test procedure: Experiment 16 was repeated. At the humanoid creature phase assistant researchers, were replaced by D-Class personnel with prior experience in SCP testing. D Personnel will hereafter be referred to as D-1 and D-2.
D Personnel expressed agitation at the half perceived creature. D-1 clawed against the door while D-2 kept his eyes at what remained of SCP-xxxx. The following conversation was recorded.
Assistant Reiner "Please describe what you see."
D-1 "[Expletive Redacted] let us out!"
D-2 "I don't know, there's… it's… there's something in here! I can't see it."
Assistant Reiner "How do you know there is something in there?"
Assistant Reiner "How do you know there is something in there?"
D-2 "I can feel it! Dude, it vanished, get them to open the [Expletive Redacted] door!"
D-1 "I'm trying, I'm trying!"
Assistant Reiner. "Please remain calm."
D-2 "It's coming for us! I can tell it is coming for us!"
At this point D-2 started screaming. D-1 started crying. A recording of SCP-xxxx describing himself was activated, and armed personnel entered the room. D-1 was curled up in a fetus position at the entrance. D-2 was found lying a bit further away unconscious and was initially mistaken for SCP-xxxx. SCP-xxxx was initially unlocatable, but after approximately 3 minutes, 19 seconds, could be found leaning against the far wall, clutching his head in his hand, apparently suffering a panic attack.
Class B amnesiacs were administered to SCP-xxxx.
Test Conclusion: Due to the strain on SCP-xxxx already stressed psyche coupled with the apparent localised nature of its condition this line of testing has been suspended.
On ice for now:
Note: This scp is kinda dumb. Put it on ice for now.
Item #: SCP-7777
Object Class: Safe/Euclid/Keter (indicate which class)
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-7777 in the middle of a 11x11x11m container, a minimum of six meters above ground and six meters away from any wall. At no point should any unathorized personnel be allowed within five meters from SCP-7777.
SCP-7777 is a figurine of Saint Mary constructed from industrial porcelaine. It was retrieved by the Foundation in 99/03/15 from ████████ in eastern europe, after reports of a 64 year old woman giving birth. Anyone coming within 5 meters of the figurine becomes pregnant with a human fetus, regardless of their age, gender, or species. During retrieval, the MTF-containment team were accidentally affected, in addition to at least one housecat. All members of the MTF team had their pregnancy aborted by means of surgery. Subsequent human testing was conducted on D-Class. Animal testing was conducted on cows.
In the case of human females of an appropriate age, no abnormal effects of this pregnancy has been observed. In the case of human males a massive number of complications occur, starting with severe internal mutations that occur over time, followed by internal organ damage, an increase in hormone levels, particulary estrogen, the formation of a placenta inside the gut, pressing away the upper intestine tracts, and an increase in blood pressure. The fetus itself has a high risk of becoming malformed. Estimated chances of survival to carry to term is at around 40%. This is abnormally high considering the extensive damage, but due to a limited number of tests may be due to a statistical outlier. In all causes the fetus has to be surgically removed in the final stages of the pregnancy. Survival rates after a fully realized birth are unknown.
In the case of one female housecat, the animal perished within three months and two weeks of the conception. Dissection showed extensive damage to the internal structure of the animal, as well as the fetus itself being malformed. DNAtesting on the remains of the fetus revealed 100% human DNA. DNA testing on the blood of the cat revealed one 100% cat DNA.
In the cause of cows there was a 90% survival rate until birth. In all cases, the baby was malformed. In all cases, the cow perished after the birth.
Only a small amount of testing was done on SCP-7777, as of ████ only ██ humans and ██ animals have been tested. The children derived from this testing has been labeled as SCP-7777-1 and put into a Foundation run orphanage and will be monitored for signs of anomalous properties. As of 10/03/15 no signs of anomalous properties have been detected.
Addendum - Overwatch Directive 7777-1a: 12/01/03:
All instances of SCP-7777-1 are to be terminated immediately. Their remains are to be incinerated and buried in unmarked graves, in ground not sanctified by any religion. No priest of any abrahamic faith is to conduct any rite related to SCP-7777-1 or their remains.
In ██/██/██ Researcher ████ tested the effects of SCP-7777 on grass. Trace amounts of human cells where found within the plants. Further tests on trees revealed attempts at forming human organs. Further tests on granite blocks revealed distinct alterations within the rocks internal structure. In all cases, the effect slowed down and stopped over time.
You know how people sometime says "people make mistakes" or "it is human to be fallible" or things in those veins?
Yeah recently I've been thinking about that and it doesn't make sense.
Humans do make mistakes, this is true. It is a biological fact. A brain only have the capacity to deal with so many things at once, memory tends to be optimized in funny ways, inevitable we miss out on a detail or two.
But really everything fails. Animals certainly do.
Gets them killed.
Ever had a computer fail on you? Programs and algorithms often make mistakes. I suppose you could blame the ones who built 'em, but really at some point you just have to go fuck you and note that things are actively out to get you. Imagine how much more effective medicine would be if no one made a mistake. Even simple ones, like putting in a suture incorrectly, or not noticing a wound having gone bad. We got the technology, but it doesn't matter, because we will make a mistake and the equipment will make a mistake, and the ones who made the equipment will make mistakes, and the ones who uses it and the ones who try to dismantle it and the ones who try to kill it, and the only reason we are still alive is that it made a… yeah.
This is why redundancy is good. Helps you cover your arse when you fuck up.
Mistakes can be used to cover your own arse as well. It's not that you are incompetent. You just made a mistake.
Or hell, it can be used to get someone else's arse on the firing line. It's not your fault he fucked up. Everyone makes mistakes. How would you know?
Course, either of those things are a mistake. Viable to get you shot, in some places.
Reality warpers ARE NOT GODS! They just warp what's already there! No mary has ever created something wholecloth new! You ever met a designer bender? A God per definition would be a creator! The God would be the one responsible for the universe and us! And that's not a bender! That's something entirely different. There's only one God I believe in, and that is humanity itself. Can't you see it? We, as a species, are a creator. We as a species, are a destroyer. We are the only one. Not animals. Not the fucking essepes, us. It's all from us. A lone God in a broken universe, clinging to existence at the bottom of an abyss, fractured into a billion pieces, all laughing and working and dying and crawling as we try to dig ourselves out. You know how you know an essepe is a fake? Bit of misinformation thrown to the goks for them to chew at while the grownups do the important work?
It doesn't come from us.
How to survive and thrive while dealing with essepes, things that can kill you or worse in ways you often won't full know, much less understand? Well.
The classic one is the five tiered approach. First item. Avoidance. Try to get someone else to deal with the thing first. That's why we got security clearances after all. The keeping things secret is mostly secondary, I'm pretty sure.
If that doesn't work sneak away.
That fails you can always run. Sometimes the guards got guns and don't appreciate a researcher bolting though.
After that comes fighting. You'd be surprised how much you can pull off in moments of life threatening desperation. Lots of people actually get a high of it. If you're bad at avoiding shit, try to be one of those.
Then running again, just faster. Don't worry about bullets, at this point everyone should be either dead or trying to kill you anyway.
The real problem of course is how to know when to do x or y. Some essepes get a high out of you running, you know. And when do you throw protocol to the i dunno, insert scp of your choice here, and when do you follow it to the fucking ink it's printed on.
That's it really. It all comes down to guts.
Some people just got an innate sense when to do what. Most don't, and if they get into a situation they die. Most who do die as well. Those who don't… well they sharpen their gut. Those guys… you know the high profile ones? Right, Bright, Light, Sight, Fight, Tight, Mike, Might, eeeh I dunno. Point is at that point you can raze half a site and probably get away with it.
Not so much because of your own skill. At that point the O5 simply needs you, badly. You're a rare resource
(Insert random question here…)
Tell me NOW! Gutfeeling NOW!
Yeah… you're going to die.
Item #: SCP-XXX
Object Class: Safe
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXX is to be kept in a hermetically sealed container. While handled, personnel are to wear gas masks. Removal of items from SCP-XXX is to be done using a remotely controlled drone with a minimum safety distance of five meters, and all items are to be returned to SCP-XXX within a 24 hour period. Personnel which have been in the vicinity of SCP-xxx for two hours, or personnel which have been in the vicinity of SCP-xxx on three different occasions should be barred from further experimentation.
Description: SCP-XXX is a white plastic grocery bag with no brandmarkings containing one (1) packet of multi-vitamin tablets, one(1) loaf of pre-sliced bread, dark, two(2) chocolate bars and one(1) smaller plastic bag containing five(5) oranges. It was retrieved from xxxx in 1989. People in the vicinity of SCP-xxx experiences strong feelings of nausea, dizzyness and stomach pains. At a one meter distance, these feelings become near overwhelming. So far no normal healthy human have been able to retrieve the items from SCP-xxx without vomiting and collapsing of intense stomach pain. Items inside SCP-xxx does not seem to age or decay over time.
Addendum-1: Lacking a sense of smell will lessen but not remove the effects of SCP-xxx. No smell have been successfully measured from SCP-xxx.
Addendum-2: Personnel repeatedly in the vicinity of SCP-xxx have reported a permanent low level nausea in their stomach. No biological error seem to be present and no treatment have as of yet functioned.
SCP-1108 - The Cyclops
Item #: SCP-1108
Object Class: Safe
Special Containment Procedures: Subject is to be contained within an 10x15 meter cell. The cell should be kept empty save for a black stone slab, SCP-1088-1, into which a chain is embedded. The other end of the chain locks around SCP-1108s ankle. The shackle is locked in place by a six(6) centimeter long pin; at no point should this pin be removed. Should the subject need to be moved for any reason, at least six fully armed guards should be deployed, along with two extra personnel to carry the slab. The stone slab weights 62 kg and it is recommended to transport it by means of a trolley. Subject should be fed 200 kg of raw meat weekly, as well as 30 liters of water each day. Food is to be supplied by electronic conveyer system built into the floor of SCP-1108's containment cell. Under no circumstance should personnel move within arms reach of subject.
SCP-1108 is a 8.6 meter tall humanoid male creature, of apparent ██████ descent, with a single large eye in the middle of its head. The subject seems to be of an highly advanced age. Hair is dull grey and floor length; attempts to fully trim it have been met with minor resistance. Its skin is extremely wrinkled and rough. The eye itself is a light grey, and is relatively milky. SCP-1108 has poor eyesight, at most it is able to pick out moving shapes. Its eyesight does not deteriorate in poorly lit conditions; testing has shown it can detect movement even in pitch darkness. Samples taken from SCP-1108's hair indicate that it is over ████ years old.
SCP-1108 is sentient and capable of speech in a heavily accented ancient █████ dialect. It is rather distrustful, mostly speaking in short, clipped sentences. Attempts to ascertain subject's intelligence have been unfruitful. Tests have shown wildly varying results, however, this may be due to translation issues. Additionally, subject will attempt to convince, cajole, torture, intimidate, maim and otherwise forcible persuade anyone it is capable of into removing the pin from SCP-1108-1, as to release it.
SCP-1108 have shown extensive knowledge of ancient ██████ mythology, and has been able to provide information on [DATA EXPUNGED] as well as the location and nature of ███████ (Retrieval operation in process.)
SCP-1108 is indeterminately strong. It is much stronger and faster than either its significant size or apparent age and frailty would imply; it is capable of tearing through a reinforced titanium cage. Personnel are advised to remain beyond arms reach of subject at all times, unless wearing full body armor and properly equipped.
SCP-1108 was discovered in a cave by a team of mountaineers conducting an expedition in the vicinity of ███████. The subject was chained to 1108-1 when found. The Foundation was soon alerted using standard channels and a retrieval team was sent to secure SCP-1108. During the retrieval the pin was removed; resulting in ██ casualties and the near escape of SCP-1088. SCP-1108-2 was discovered while pursuing SCP-1108.
1108-1 consists of a chain of unknown metal, as well as a black stone slab, identified to be of normal obsidian. The chain is five meters long, each link being a foot in length. The chain has not shown any signs of wear or tear since its acquisition by the Foundation. SCP-1108 refuses to touch the slab for any reason, even when subjected to intense electrical shocks. In addition, SCP-1108 refuses to pull the chain so as to tug at the stone slab, even though its apparent strength should be more than enough to carry the slab. Additionally, SCP-1108 refuses to discuss the origins of the slab, stating only “They have had their revenge". At this point, no anomalous properties has been ascertained in the slab. The chain appears indestructible, and thus we have been unable to conduct any tests on the material it consists of.
Close to the cave SCP-1108 was initially encountered, the remnants of a village was located buried underground, likely due to natural erosion. The remnants consiste of approximately twenty clay dwellings, the dimensions of which could have contained other speciments of SCP-1108. Several primitive tools and implements where found of similar sizes, as well as the skeletal remains of fourteen individuals, each skeleton between four to nine meters high. Excavations are currently ongoing.
Addendum 3: SCP is not to be fed human meat.
“No, we do not care 'what he could tell us'.”
“ No, not even if we terminate it first. What the hell is wrong with you? There are standard procedures for D-personnel termination. Dr ████ is to report for immediate psych-evaluation, and to be barred from accessing SCP-1108 effective immediate.”
Alternative version to addendum 3… trying to make him more violent? Don't really have the time to clean write it. Put it up mostly to keep notes in one place. The Empty Chalice is just a name.
Test Runner: Dr Ever selected due to extensive knowledge of SCP-1108 language. Dr Ever was accompanied by three(3) guards.
Test Procedure: Standard interview.
"Tell us what you know of The Empty Chalice!"
"Tell us first."
"Sacrifice. Feed me. Better food than this."
"You must tell us!"
"Him." SCP-1108 indicates guard to right of Dr Ever.
"We will feed you if you tell us!"
Indicated guard backs away. Dr Ever turns to him.
"This isn't working. Soldier, give me your sidearm."
Indicated guard stops backing away, looks to Dr Ever and hesitates.
Guard glances to his comrade, unholsters his weapon and hands it to Dr Ever.
Dr Ever shoots indicated guard once(1) in the knee and once(1) in the throat, grabs him by his collar and pushes him into arms reach of SCP-1108. SCP-1108 immediately captures guard. Two remaining guards move to constrain Dr Ever. SCP-1108 proceeds to bite into captured guards left arm, throws him down onto the floor and forcible attempts to make him open his shackle. Guard at this point looses consciousness. SCP-1108 mutters "Worthless" and proceeds to bite off Guard #1's head. Dr Ever is forcible escorted from cell while screaming at SCP-1108 to inform him of the empty Chalice. SCP-1108 responds with laughter and continues eating Guard #1
Conclusion: Guard remnants removed. SCP-1108 subjected to shock treatment. Dr Ever demoted. He will remain in project as a translator, but will no longer be responsible for tests. When not used for the project he is to be kept under arrest. He is authorized to contain his research under supervision. Guard duty for SCP-1108 have been rotated, due to low morale after incident, as well as possible risks to Dr Ever and SCP-1108.
Test Runner: Dr Thorn, assisted by Dr Ever for translation.
Test Procedure: Dr Thorn will interview subject. Dr Thorn will carry earset and microphone. Dr Ever will translate from other room. Dr Thorn will be accompanied by four(4) guards.
"Give me… father"
"We give you human. You tell us all knowledge of Empty Chalice.."
"[Untranslatable - SCP-1108 indicates Dr ]… father"
SCP-1108 slams fist into floor creating a dent and roars. Building noticable shakes.
[Stream of Untranslatable phrases]
"This is useless. Start electro shock treatment."
Conclusion: Electro shock treatment ineffective. Request to terminate SCP-1108 rejected.
Addendum 4: Protocol 73:
In the event of a containment breach, an attempt should be made to keep SCP-1108 alive. Lethal force is only authorized if SCP-1108's breach risks secondary breaches on-site. In the event of a termination, target is to be stunned by either flash-bang grenades or any source of sudden and bright light, followed up by repeated close quarter shotgun rounds to face and legs, followed by the use of standard grade explosives.
In the event the subject needs to be taken alive, it is recommended to apply flash-bang grenades to stun the subject, followed by repeated damage to the legs, followed by intense electrical shocks using the cattle prods stored in locker #C7. If necessary, threats of blinding the subject may be used. SCP-1108-1 then needs to be located and affixed around the subjects ankle.
Dr ████ will take over after Dr ████. Dr ████ will remain attached to SCP-1108 as a translator, but will be disallowed any direct contact. Allowing SCP-1108 access to one(1) D-personnel a month has been authorized. D-personnel must be stripped down and remnants after termination removed with particular care of bone fragments.
Disclaimer: This isn't really an scp, It's more something random I wrote up.
SCP-1734 The Curtain Wall
Item #: SCP-1734
Object Class: Safe
Special Containment Procedures: [DATA EXPUNGED]
For fucks sake… you expunged the procedures? Most just have the class to redact the most minor details such as the fucking thing goes cataclysmic if in contact with water or some other rare and totally non used substance, but that's… that's just to small for you. You think big. You don't just want to be safe. You wanna be safe. You wanna be expunged. And how… how if I might ask you high and mighty lords down at Intelligence, am I supposed to write up a description for an scp when you've classified it's description, censored it's fucking images, and REDACTED IT'S FUCKING CONTAINMENT PROCEDURES!?
Or did you just leave all the EXTREMELY VITAL INFORMATION in the cardboard box with the item itself? Cause I'm telling you right now I'm not opening that fucker until you've got your collective asses in a gear, and got me someone down here that knows how to stop it eating my goddamned brain or making letters blue or whatever the fuck it is. I got an SCP!!! of which I only know the OBJECT CLASS!!!!!!!! in my godammned office right now because no other person wants it. For some indiscernible reason!
Look okay look, I get it, it could be a bureaucratic error, or you got it from someone else and decided to chuck it here. Or more like a joke. Maybe I could chuck it along…
I get it okay. Just get me the info I need and this will be forgotten.
Just the containment procedures. You know your asses could burn for this. I understand. Fuckups happen. It'll be gone. Just the containment procedures. Okay?It'll be fine.
Addendum - 1 Who the fuck classified this memo?!?
Addendum - 2 [Redacted]
Addendum - 3 For… aah. I'm Security Level 3 for…
Addendum - 4 Look guys. It's not funny anymore okay? Please, just… please stop.
Addendum 5- [DATA EXPUNGED]
Addendum 6- [DATA REDACTED]
Addendum 7 FOR
Addendum 8 [O-5 Level Access only]
Addendum 9 SAKE
Addendum 10 - This is 3rd-class Foundation Researcher Kenneth Smythe. I am currently leaving this message trough the only line of communication I have left. If you have broached my encryption you should be a Foundation member. I believe the Foundation is under an infiltration class attack from an SCP slowly erasing all records of itself, its
Addendum 11 - What is this? Anyone know? It's not exactly protocol but noone seems to give a damn. - Everett
Addendum 12 - April fools joke. Guards like to haze new personnel. I've sent the standard reprimands - Dr Thorns.
Addendum 13 - You sure? Maybe we should call I dunno… memetics research division, mobile task force, what we got in those lines? Everett
Addendum 14 - There are no records of a Kenneth Smythe in the personnel files, nor do any in the building actually know him. I'll put some men on it if I get some free. - Thorns
Addendum 15 - Gentlemen. SCP descriptions are not your personal chat channel. Please shred all copies of these you find and focus on your duties. I want no further concerned third parties making inquires. It is a very simply, and crude, prank. We will look into this, personally. - ██
"Next time on A Very Special SCP, Gears reveals his true inner turmoil to Rights while Alto and Kondraki learn the true meaning of friendship…"-Bland
"It was a very mundane day at site19, as such things go. It was autumn and the leaves on the few trees planted across the site was turning into a beautiful multitude of yellow and brown colors. It was chilly outside, but moderately so, and the man sitting across a bench paid the temperature no heed. The brilliance of the season seemed to move him not in the slightest yet the woman sitting next to him could sense something… different. The man, infamous for his indifference, and often teased for it behind his back… locked tired. Like the world was resting on his shoulders. She shock her raven black hair as if to clear her head and spoke. "Dammit Gears. I'm here for you, if you just let me. For once."
"Mon ami. I do not require your therapethic merits at this point in time. Glass is adequate so far."
"Do not give me that. I remember how we were once, in an autumn eve not unlike this one."
"That was many years ago. Time has changed us. Work has changed us."
"Dammit Gears. I found the letters. I know it was you. You could have come to me."
"That would have been unwise."
"If you do not respect me as a woman, do you respect me as a therapist."
"You are both a woman and you have sufficient merits within psychology to function as a the-"
"But do you? Do you really."
"Your merits are adequate."
"Either, mon ami."
Rights removed her glasses, looking straight into the mans dead gaze, for the first time truly understanding the inner depths of his soul. "Then as a woman, and as a woman with degrees in psychology, I am given you this order. Open up for me. It is necessary for your continuing functioning at max capacity as a foundation researcher."
The man stared at her, intensely, for a long time. The leaves fell. A d-class in the distance quietly tidied up the premises, dreaming comfortable daydreams of when he'd finish his month, of his girlfriend and of freedom.
At last the floodgates broke trough, the great wall crumbled.
"I… I left her… I left them both."
"Shh… she'd be proud of you."
The woman comforted the man. Maybe they'd find comfort in each other's arm, for a while.
Meanwhile, the two biggest assholes at site19 was staring at a computer screen, their faces dead serious. Sharing a quiet sense of brotherhood, which can only be built out of mutual respect and not a little annoyance, it was Kondraki who spoke first.
"So. Friendship really is magic."
Alto Clef, arms crossed, curled hair expertly moussed, tourned to Kondraki. "Yes. You realise what this means."
There was no hesitation in Kondraki's responce.
"We must contain it."
Next time on a Very Special SCP, Gerald is bestruck by guilt after a tragic car accident, and who made 173 pregnant?
Guard1 “Look, no belt okay? It's to much of a bother. We got buckets provided to us.”
Guard2 “Yeah but… I already gotten the belt okay? We might as well use it.”
“Why? I'm not going near that thing more than I have to.”
“Well it's just…”
“I really don't.”
“It seems undignified.”
“You know. Throwing meat into the cage. It's like we're zookeepers.”
“It's the guys from breakroom isn't it?”
“Yeah well, you should hear them! You know what Steve got? His SCP has to be submerged in liquid mercury and then fifteen spotlights have to be kept inside the platinium laced freakin' cage so it doesn't eat everyone's faces and replace them with like… I don't know he couldn't talk about it. Something cool probably!”
“It's the guys from the breakroom.”
“Rebecca's got to go trough three different kinds of decontainment. They need to bring in a frickin professional dancer and a chicken. And the guys from 1023? Claws for hands!”
“Yeah well, you know what 173 get? A bucket and a mop! Just like us.”
“Oooooh don't get me started. First they're Derps, secondly their buckets are like, a badge of pride. They're treated like bloody heroes, hell they're almost like guards, and you know it. Every inch of those buckets are a measure of their courage. Ours is a measure of how far dinner can be thrown from a safe distance.”
“… you know what's really undignified? Referring to D-Personnel as derps.”
“Look, all I want is a conveyor belt okay? C'mon, it'll help us pick up chicks. I know Sarah has a thing for really Special Special Containment Procedures.”
“Okay, a) This is not being professional, in so many ways, b) If she's an actual SCP fetishists I will not go anywhere near her, and c) get. Some. Priorities. Straight. Also, d) please stop talking.“
“C'mon! We got the bleedin' cyclops. Odysseus and all that. We should have like… a boat with like trees and stuff, and maybe some pigs. You know what we got? We got a friggin' moderately sized chunk o'rock. And buckets.”
“Seriously. The cyclops in Odysseys lost his eye. This guy is not him. Also. That makes no sense whatsoever. Also. I got a cattle prod. If you do not stop talking, I will use it.”
“Okay admittedly the cattle prods are awesome.”
“Seriously. I will stab you.”
“But c'mon, a rock!”
“I'm getting the prod.”
*descends into cattle prod swordfighting*
AWCY? Mole in the federation. Messing up files. Hmm.
Possible ideas: Ummm….
An object that slowly replaces your family, friends, loved ones, and eventually everyone around you with… doppelgangers.
Exceptions are done for members of: The Foundation. The Chaos Insurgency. The FBI. 90% of everyone with a Facebook Account. Members of the British Royal Monarchy (unverified, presumed due to object status pre-retrieval,[DATA EXPUNGED])
A bed that eats people…
You unconsciously go to sleep in it and then bam! The mattress starts to dissolve you. Bones in your legs and arms go first. By the time you wake up, it is already to late.
… nah that's stupid.
… Has been done like a bazillion times before.
How about… a bucket… that… eats you!
A discourse on mankinds insignifance? Pointless.
People that lives inside your wall and watches you when you sleep.
Mirror of considerable delight. Hah.
Item #: SCP-XXX
Object Class: Safe/Euclid/Keter (indicate which class)
Special Containment Procedures: [Paragraphs explaining the Procedures]
It's a book that eats people.
Okay fine. It's a bed that eats people.
A… mirror that eats people?
Okay okay! It's a… um… It's a… it's a video and and then you watch it and your eyes EXLPODE and there's like fountains of blood and it sprays all over and then the blood eats them!
It's a statue and then if you don't watch it it kills yo-
So maybe this is the second copy!
Well maybe this statue also eats peo… nuts?
You can't know what this is because it erases all knowl- all-
Oh c'mon, if we already have one of those, how come you know of it?
A car that kills you.
A car that doesn't kill you.
A clown that's… good. And doesn't eat people. Aha, don't have one of those.
He's anomalous because he can fly. It's something to do with Wondertainment.
I'm going home.
Addendum: [Optional additional paragraphs]