Sections in quote boxes have been re-written for grammar, clarity & word choice by Drewbear. I have tried to make sure that content/concept has been unchanged. If I have any comments about the content (I will put them in bolded parentheses)
ETA: Shamblr has made some edits. I will strike through my old edits (but not delete them) where they are no longer appropriate and put grammar edits of the current sections above old edits.
Item #: SCP-1201
Object Class: Safe
Special Containment Procedures: This is an area of 12.8 km^2 and is to be surrounded at all times by a high 12 ft heavy concrete wall. One guard post is located at the front of the town armed with tactical pistols, incase of incident where a solid projection might be aggressive. Guards are to walk the permitter of the town every 5 hours to check for damage to the inside and outside surfaces of the wall. One teams of 3 may enter the town once every 5 hours but mustn't stay for more then 3 after entry. Personnel can interact with projection but not in a disrespectful of conflicting way doing so will cause immediate reassignment.
SCP-1201-2 is an area comprising 12.8 km2 and is surrounded by a 4 meter (we use metric units, not imperial) high heavy concrete wall. One guard post is located at the entrance to the town and guards are to be armed with 10 mm tactical pistols in the case of an incident. (just saying "tactical weaponry" instead of specifying the pistols would probably work better. and what kind of incidents are they preparing for?) Guards are to patrol the perimeter of the town every 5 hours to check for damage to the containment wall. (I'm assuming that when you said inner & outer walls, you meant the inside and outside surfaces of the wall. if there is more than one containment wall, that needs to be specified) Teams of 3 may (they are allowed to enter that often, or they mustn't enter any more often than that?) enter SCP-1201-2 once every 3 hours, but can stay in the area for no more than 3 hours at a time. Personnel can interact with the denizens of the area, but should not be disrespectful or confrontational while doing so, on pain of reassignment. Please be kind to the projections and behave as if they are normal. (This last sentence can go entirely)
(Don't give the sub-components of the SCP "names". Even if the people studying it have given them nicknames, those wouldn't be in an official report. Similarly, don't call the girl Cinderella. At most, call is that on the mainlist page as a title.)
SCP-1201-A small female,burned almost ineligible papers in town suggest that she is 5-6 years old. Records also show that her name is Ella she has Short brown hair that is stained with soot along with her cloths. She wears a blue night gown similar to 1201-3. It seems that SCP-1201 has projected her town ablaze and same events of that night and morning replaying over and over.The flames are only projections but still very dangerous as well as the smoke.We have erased a records showing this town and girl ever existed.She has also manifested 3 solid projection that may have relevance to her last memory ,1201-3,1201-4,and 1201-5.
SCP-1201: A small, burned female who appears to be 5-6 years old. Damaged documents recovered from SCP-1201-2's town hall suggest that her name is Ella █████. She has short brown hair which is stained with soot, as is her clothing. She wears a blue nightgown similar in appearance to that worn by SCP-1201-3 (Now that you have a picture, telling us about her hair/clothing isn't needed. Also, I think you meant SCP-1201-5, her mother. Good picture, by the way) SCP-1201 is apparently creating a projection of her home town over the course of a single day as it burns. She repeats this cycle anew every day. The Foundation has erased all records showing this town and girl ever existed. (This sentence is somewhat awkward from a content standpoint. It's also unnecessary, as you tell the town's history when you describe it. A sentence about the Foundation suppressing/erasing the records is a good idea, but should be in the containment procedures.) SCP-1201 has also manifested 3 additional solid projections that appear to have significance to her last memories.
SCP-1201 - A female (this needs some description: about how old is she? does she look normal? burned? see-through?) named Ella █████ (how do we know that? did she tell us? is she called that by the other projections? did we find it in records of the town?), although she seems to like the name the staff have begun calling her: "Cinderella". (Again, cut this whole nickname bit) Dr. ████ suggests that staff refrain from getting attached to Ella (providing a name for an SCP is okay one time is, but don't do it again unless there are containment reasons to do so. Replace all "Ella"s after the first one with "SCP-1201") as it is unknown how long her powers can last. "This is all still just a projection […] she could turn to bones and dust at any time." Staff felt sad but soon brushed it off and have continued to talk with Ella. (cut this entire section about the doctor's suggestion & response from the staff. it's unnecessary, distracting, and doesn't belong in an official report. Also, you need to actually describe what it is that SCP-1201 DOES. This paragraph is a description of what she is and just reading this paragraph, a reader would have no idea.)
SCP-1201-2:\The town of ██████ is 12.8 km^2.It is the biggest projection SCP-1201 has made.The Town burns from night till morning the rest of the day is quiet till it is night again.There are also grey bodied projections that are the citizens they have no cosmetic feature but we are able to tell which are female and male.Foundation members are able to interact with them when talked to they act hysterical waving there arms all around pointing and yelling screaming and crying.From the records we found in town-hall The town of ██████ was settled in 18██ by J████ ████ who was the leading settler.The cause of the fire is unknown at this point.
SCP-1201-2: A projection of the town of ██████, which covers 12.8 km2. It is the largest projection SCP-1201 has made. (On reflection, this sentence isn't necessary. It's suggested by the rest of the descriptions about the other projections) The town burns from dusk until dawn every day and reforms whole and quiet in the morning, at which point it can be safely explored. It is populated by featureless grey-bodied projections, who are apparently representative of the original citizens of the town. Agents are able to communicate with these projections, but their reactions are largely limited to hysteria in response to the town burning. Records found in the town hall indicate that ██████ was settled in 18██. (I've cut the bit about who founded it. That's completely unnecessary) The cause of the fire is unknown at this point.
SCP-1201-2: "The Town" (again, don't use these nicknames) - The town of ██████ covers 12.8 km2. It is the biggest projection SCP-1201 has made. The town continually burns for no more than 2 days, then reconstructs. It contains grey-bodied projections (so do they look like actual people? are they just featureless figures? can they actually interact with Foundation agents?) that seem to be regular citizens of the town. There are 3 other significant projections that wander the town, as described below. (Did the town ever actually exist? Did it actually burn down for real at some point? When?)
SCP-1201-3: A white dog that wonders the burning embrues streets with a collar smudged with soot. This soot doesn't rub off so the exact name of the dog is unknown.It is likely and vague image she saw in the last few moments of the town standing.1201-3 can be physically touched and acts like a regular dog keeping its personality from when it was more then just a projection. It is safe and doesn't harm any personnel.
SCP-1201-3: A white dog that wanders the burning streets. It wears a collar smudged with soot. This soot cannot be rubbed off, so the exact name of the dog is unknown. Unlike the grey-bodied projections, SCP-1201-3 can be physically touched and otherwise retains the personality and behavior of a normal dog. It is friendly and has not displayed any aggression towards Foundation personnel. It is considered likely that it is based off a vague image SCP-1201 saw in the last few moments of the town standing.
SCP-1201-3: "White" - A white dog that wanders the burning streets. It wears a collar smudged with soot. (Silt the is deposit at the bottom of a river or stream. I assume you meant soot) This soot doesn't rub off for some reason, so the exact name of the dog is unknown. (remove "for some reason". And explain here why the dog is significant. Is it that we can physically interact with it? Does it do something special?) It is considered likely that this vague image is what SCP-1201 saw in the last few moments of the town standing.
SCP-1201-4:"the firemen"A fireman standing 1.85 meters tall wearing gas mask similar to ones made in the early 1900s.He speaks with a muffled voice as you can't hear him due to the mask. Speculation of Dr.████ suggests that 1201 met him and only remembers his muffled voice hence why we can't hear him.He wields a fireman's axe and helps evacuate projections from burning buildings and out of town.When projections leave town limits the fade back into it.He seems to be forever rescuing projections in town,when we talk to him he muffles and when we ask him to remove the mask so we can hear him he shakes his head no and runs and continues to help projection.Projections seem to know what hes saying which we can't figure out why.
SCP-1201-4: A fireman standing 1.85 meters tall, who is wearing a gas mask similar to ones made in the early 1900s. He speaks with a muffled voice due to the gas mask and his speech cannot be understood. Requests for him to remove the gas mask have been refused. Dr. ████ sepculates that this is because SCP-1201 met him briefly and only remembers his muffled voice. SCP-1201-4 wields a fireman's axe and helps evacuate the grey-bodied projections from burning buildings and out of town. When these projections leave the town limits, they fade back in to it. SCP-1201-4's speech appears to be completely understood by other projections.
SCP-1201-4: "The Fireman" - A fireman standing 1.85 meters tall (again, use metric units) wearing a vintage gas mask. ("vintage"? Give a date range. Something like "a gas mask similar to those manufactured in the 1920s" or whenever the town was originally supposed to have burned) His voice is muffled by the gas mask and he cannot be understood. Dr. ████ speculates that this is due to SCP-1201 having met him and only remembering his muffled voice. He wields a fireman's axe and helps evacuate projections. (evacuate from where? evacuating them from burning buildings? evacuating them from the town?)
SCP-1201-5:The last major projection and probably one of the most controversial to the staff "Ella's" Mother. She is 1.52 meters tall has long, brown, curly hair stained with soot, making it partially black.Records in town hall are how we confirmed this is the mother of 1201.She wears a pink nightgown and slippers wandering the town bumping into other projections looking for 1201.She rarely finds SCP-1201, at which point [DATA EXPUNGED] until the next cycle of the overall loop.
SCP-1201-5: The final major projection and probably one of the most controversial to the staff (again, why?) is SCP-1201's mother. She stands 1.52 meters tall and has long, brown, curly hair. She is wearing a pink nightgown and slippers. Both her hair and clothing are stained with soot, making them partially black. She wanders the town, bumping into other projections while looking for SCP-1201. She rarely finds SCP-1201, at which point [DATA EXPUNGED] until the next cycle of the overall loop.
SCP-1201-5 - The last major projection and probably one of the most controversial to the staff is Ella's mother. (why is she controversial? how do we know she's SCP-1201's mother? you should probably remove the whole "controversial" bit unless there's an important reason that she's controversial) She has long, brown, curly hair stained with soot, making it partially black. (It seems odd that you provide no physical description of SCP-1201 itself, provide only the height and outfit of the fireman and only provide the hair color of the mother. Standardize the descriptions. Maybe describe the mother here using "her hair and clothing as partially stained with soot." It can be assumed that the soot makes the stained areas look black) She roams the streets bumping into people while searching for Ella. She never seems to find her. ("seems"? The Foundation would try to find out whether they ever meet up and, if they do, what happens. If they never meet up, change this to something like "The mother never finds SCP-1201, despite her frantic searches". If they do meet up, change this to something like "The mother only rarely finds SCP-1201, at which point [DATA EXPUNGED] until the next cycle of the overall loop.")
I haven't editted the stuff in the collapsible yet, but may come back to it later.
Note from Dr. ████:
I wonder if Ella has a father or other relatives in town. I also find it very interesting how the major projections are just how Ella saw them during or before the fire. (cut this section entirely. if you want to include something about the dad, add an addendum that says something like "Agents are investigating whether or not SCP-1201 also has projections of her father or other relatives wandering the town.)