Tanhony

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXX is currently contained in Storage Unit ██, located in Site ██. SCP-XXX is to be kept in a 10cm x 10cm sealed container and kept under guard by one (1) security officer at all times. Any personnel handling SCP-XXX in any way must wear protective gloves while doing so.

Only one (1) specimen of SCP-XXX-1 may be kept in containment at any time. Subjects in the final stages of SCP-XXX compromisation are to be fed via IV tube as dictated in Nutritional Chart XXX-1.

If any personnel become compromised by SCP-XXX outside of authorised testing, the affected hand is to be immediately washed and decontaminated. Any testing involving SCP-XXX must be authorised by at least two (2) members of Level Three personnel.

Description: SCP-XXX is a black marker pen of the █████ brand. SCP-XXX's anomalous properties first become apparent when it is used to draw the image of a 'smiley face' onto the palm of a human subject, who will hereafter be referred to simply as SCP-XXX-1. The initial effects of SCP-XXX take roughly a week to initially manifest, and this time period has been known to vary depending on the age and the physical condition of SCP-XXX-1. During this period before initial manifestation, washing off or otherwise removing the 'smiley face' will negate SCP-XXX's effects.

Subjects experiencing the effects of SCP-XXX will noticeably raise their affected hand during their daily routines. Initially, they will only do this when conversing with others, but as SCP-XXX compromisation progresses, they will raise their affected hand higher than the rest of their body constantly. Later symptoms of these initial stages include unfocused pupils, loose hanging of the head and slight slurring of speech.

The initial period of compromisation only lasts a period of time which is at its most one (1) week, and after it ends SCP-XXX's further mental effects will become apparent. SCP-XXX-1 will begin to believe that the face drawn on their palm is their actual face and will behave as such. Interestingly, tests have indicated that SCP-XXX-1 does have a limited awareness of what the face drawn on their palm is looking at. After a period ranging from two (2) to six (6) days has passed, the final stage of SCP-XXX compromisation will begun.

SCP-XXX-1 will begin to believe that their head is a dangerous growth on their body, commonly referring to it as a 'tumor' or a 'cancer', and will attempt to remove it using whatever tools are available to them. If they cannot find a method of efficiently decapitating themselves, they will attempt to use cruder methods such as repeatedly slamming their head upon walls or floors. Seventy-five (75) percent of affected individuals have been known to survive their self-decapitation, despite the resultant lack of a brain and the mental and physical functions associated with it.

After self-decapitation, a surviving SCP-XXX-1 will wander aimlessly, showing a general awareness of their surroundings by moving around obstructions. Surviving instances of SCP-XXX-1 do not appear to be concerned regarding the massive amount of blood loss relating to their self-decapitation, and will survive for a time period ranging from one (1) to six (6) hours.

*

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: The area surrounding the village of ██████ is to be contained behind two (2) meter tall electrical fencing. The perimeter of the containment area is to be patrolled by groups of three (3) armed guards, switching shifts every two (2) hours. Any trespassers are to be captured alive, interrogated, and if they are found to be unaware of SCP-XXX's existence, dosed with a Class-A amnesiac and released.

All active instances of SCP-XXX are to be kept in the containment area so as to retain their functionality and allow extended research of their behaviour. In order to prevent SCP-XXX instances from attempting to leave the containment area while hunting, two (2) bovine are to be released into the containment area each week.

Any experiments involving SCP-XXX instances must be authorised by at least two (2) members of Level Four personnel.

Description: SCP-XXX is the collective designation for twenty (20) wooden ceremonial statues which were discovered in the abandoned tribal village of ██████, where they are currently contained. All SCP-XXX instances are capable of movement and of utilizing tools such as spears and knives. SCP-XXX instances appear to be organised into two (2) groups, both of which appear to be focused on the procurement of food:

• Hunter instances of SCP-XXX primarily operate using throwing spears and knives, though they have been observed to attempt to use surrounding objects such as sticks as blunt weaponry on the occasions where they have lost their primary tools. Hunter instances each seem to be focused on a single residence of the village each, and will attempt to transport any food they have gathered to said residence. Hunter instances appear to be slightly faster and to have faster response times than cook instances.

• Cook instances of SCP-XXX primarily utilize primitive carving knives and food preparation tools. Like hunter instances of SCP-XXX, cook instances each appear to be focused on a single village residence, and will remain in it during the day. At night, cook instances will take any food gathered by their corresponding hunter instance to the center of the village and hold it above where the village fire was believed to have once been. They will then place the food in a corner of the residence, and wait until morning.

Supplies for the development and maintenance of SCP-XXX instances appear to have been kept in the chieftains residence, which upon inspection contained the dissected carcass of a wild boar, several wooden limbs similar to those possessed by SCP-XXX instances, suggesting they were to be used as replacements in case of damage, and a half-completed hunter instance of SCP-XXX. Said half-completed instance was removed from the containment area for further study (See Inspection Log XXX-1). The cook instance the half-completed instance is believed to have corresponded to has since become inactive.

Inspection Log XXX-1:

The inspection was performed by Dr. █████, who was accompanied by one (1) armed guard in case of hostility on the part of the half-completed SCP-XXX instance.

Utilizing a precision drill, it was determined that the entirety of SCP-XXX instances other than the cranium are completely hollow. Inspection of the cranium revealed several items. The retrieved items, the purpose of which are currently unknown, included:

• A fragment of bone, believed to have been chipped from the skull of the wild boar which was discovered in the chieftains residence.

• A spearhead

• A small amount of dirt

• A scrap of the material used by the villagers to construct their residences

• A dead mosquito

• Six (6) human hairs

*

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXX is to be contained in Storage Unit ██, located at Site ██. SCP-XXX is to be contained in a 15cm x 15cm sealed container. SCP-XXX is to be kept under guard by one (1) security officer at all times. Viewing of SCP-XXX must be conducted by members of D-class personnel.

If any additional components of SCP-XXX are discovered to exist, they are to be immediately secured and contained by Mobile Task Force Zeta-29 ("Dragon Slayers"). Any civilians affected by SCP-XXX are to be brought into Foundation custody for two (2) weeks. If, at the end of this period, they have not expired, they are to be dosed with a Class-A amnesiac and released.

Any testing with SCP-XXX must be authorised by at least two Level Three personnel.

Description: SCP-XXX is the designation given to a collection of media which includes poems, short stories, a novel and a VHS tape. All components have thematic links to an entity which the components refer to as 'the Dragon'. Descriptions of this entity vary with SCP-XXX's different components, and very few of the components describe SCP-XXX in accordance with the traditional image of a dragon. (See Component Analysis XXX-1 for further information.)

SCP-XXX's anomalous effects become apparent when it is viewed and understood by a human being, who will hereafter be referred to as the subject. Over the course of two weeks, the subject will experience the following phenomena:

• Dreams involving vaguely reptilian entities
• Valuables such as jewellery mysteriously disappearing
• Perceiving a drastic increase in the temperature
• A feeling that they are being followed
• Spontaneous combustion (This has not been known to occur with all subjects, and it is unknown what criteria, if any, affects whether this will occur. After death, the body of the subject has been known to disappear, accompanied by the sounds of consumption.)

*

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: Any transmissions from SCP-XXX are to be intercepted and blocked from being accessed by the general public. Any civilian groups aware of SCP-XXX's existence are to be tracked down and dosed with Class-A amnesiacs by Mobile Task Force Beta-9 ("Blindfolders"). All transmissions from SCP-XXX are to be recorded and stored in Site ██'s video archive.

Description: SCP-XXX is a series of signals presumed to be sent from a possible future affected by an GH-class "dead greenhouse" scenario, due primarily to the content of the transmissions, although alternative hypothesis' are being considered. These transmissions are phrased in Morse code, and are most commonly received in a three (3) mile area located in the Nevada desert. Appliances which are known to receive these transmissions are:

• Computers
• Radios
• Televisions
• Telephones
• Cell phones
• Answering machines

All transmissions are sent by what claims to be an artificial intelligence created by this alternate SCP Foundation which has survived the GH-class "dead greenhouse" scenario. The messages sent take the form of reports to the intelligence's superiors and often involve it claiming to have contained anomalous subjects. What the intelligence considers to be anomalous wildly varies in its reports, sometimes claiming to have contained subjects for superfluous reasons such as the size of their feet or for having minor injuries.

Transmission Log

Transmission 1:

scpjerome report

Contacting scp command. Please respond at first possible time. 3 subjects contained for anomalous properties: possible sign of 281928 infection, unexplained absence of left eye, possibl[FORGOTTEN]. Containment witnessed by 1 bovine. Please reply with proper procedure on administering class a amnesiac to bovine witnesses.

Transmission 2:

scpjerome report

contacting scp command. please respond at first possible time. reporting on enviromental abnormalities: unusual abundance of human remains, noted decay in civil structures, severe reduction in civilian presence. have new protection mandates been issued? there is a hole in the sky where the sun should be. mobile protection forces have failed to [FORGOTTEN]port in.

Transmission 3:

scpjerome report

seven anomalous subjects contained: abnormal foot size, possible injury allowing infection of 29122, [FORGOTTEN] four anomalous subjects expired for unknown reasons. distressed vocalisations emitted from six anomalous subjects for unknown reasons. please reply with orders. has there been an error in judgement?

Transmission 4:

[FORGOTTEN] report

please reply with confirmation of foundation continuation. all anomalous subjectgs [FORGOTTEN]. have new protection mandates been issued? have new containment mandates been issued? please explain lack of communications for 72 years. is your location experiencing communications difficulties?

Transmission 5:

scpjerome report

hello, i am scpjerome, protector and container of scp foundation. are you still living? please send message confirming life sign and continued orders. my function is [FORGOTTEN] what is your function? are you there? please reply with orders. previous orders were [FORGOTTEN], current orders are contact surviving civilian elements in order to recieve further orders. are you there?

Transmission 6:

scpjerome report

hello, i am scpjerome, protector and [FORGOTTEN]. sending this message and all previous messages via all non-anomalous and anomalous methods of broadcasts. is there anyone there? are you still living? is there anyone there? please reply with orders.

Transmission 7:

scpjerome report

hello! are you alive? transmitting contents of information archives.

Transmission 8:

scpjerome report

contact has been lost. are you still there?

(To date, transmissions 7 and 8 have been sent a total of six (6) times.)

*

The following is a transcript of the vocalized narration D-929181 spoke when affected by SCP-2100. All narration was given during a standard series of tests to ascertain the mental effects caused by SCP-2100 on the subject.

(When given initial instructions by Dr. █████.)
D-929181: The dame wore hazmat. I'd never been a clever guy, but the lady was throwing out more danger signals than a barbed sex-doll. She pulled a face like she'd smelt something bad on me, maybe she had. Not much time for showers in this godforsaken place. She was talking about tests or something. Tests? Hope she didn't expect me to do any math, the only thing I could add these days were entries to the obituary column. I coughed, but she had already stopped talking. Was like she could read my mind. Last time I'd thought about that kind of thing was when I was twelve, at one of those old circus, big family fun kinda things. Fortuneteller told me I'd be a lawyer. I guess I did lay down the law.

(When instructed to write a small paragraph on his current situation.)
D-929181: Bitch was mocking me now, acting like I'm some brain-dead chimp who couldn't string a few sentences together. Guess I'd been right with the danger signals, unlike that time in Atlanta. Bastard had stabbed me twice in the hand before I had taken him down. I'd used my shoe to do it, beat him till he was a smear of ketchup on the burned meat of the sidewalk. I had shoes on now, nice and sturdy. I prepped myself to get up and try to take her down, but her gun was already pointed at me. Goddamn fortunetellers. I played her game, wrote down a nice little summary of my current situation. Probably pleased her as much as a skinned dog, I knew her kind. They liked to see you twitch and suffer, especially when all the skins gone. A nice distraction if you can manage to get enough free time and somewhere to keep the meat hidden. Goddamn sadist.

(When instructed to walk the length of the room several times.)
D-929181: Had a good opportunity to stretch my legs, and I took it. The walls and floor of the room were whiter than a Ku Klux Klan member trapped in a paint factory. Except the guard, he wore black. Bastard had a broken nose, and broken eyes to boot. He glared at me, maybe he knew what I thought of him or maybe he was just the spiteful type. Certainly looked it. You met guys like that: the guys who like to dip animals in lemon water after cutting them up, but only after everyone's gone to sleep so nobody finds out about it. His glare was fiercer than the look coming from a pastor who's just been told that God is dead. Good, anger made him stupid. I went for him, this could be my chance.

(At this point, present security personnel was forced to shoot D-929181 in self-defense.)
D-929181: First bullet went into my ribs, second my leg. Lot of blood, from the wounds and from my mouth. I tried to close it, but I couldn't manage it. Just opened and closed like a bored goldfish's. I was saying something, I couldn't quite hear it. Talking about bullets in my ribs and in my legs. What the hell? Why was I telling everyone about that? I realized. The hat, that goddamn hat they'd made me wear. I tried to take it off, but moving anything hurt more than going into space with a hangover. Who the fuck talked like that, I wondered. Bleeding out and making metaphors? I braced myself to snatch that thing off, but before I could breathe, move or blink, I went ahead and died.

(Subject expired at this point.)

*

Ess-see-pee. I say it under my breath. Ess-see-pee. It's all that's left of before.

The desert stretches before my feet. A building floats in the air. I smile at it, it smiles back. Things are…different now. I continue on my way. The sand is made of tiny bird bones: they crackle like cereal. I had cereal at a monastery back in Chicago, up north. I had stayed there for a couple of days, and headed west here. Suicide was possible here, they had said it on the radios, they all had the same voice. Sometimes they whispered about fishing. I ask them to be quiet, I'm sleeping. You're A Selfish Bastard, they say. I'd been trying it every mile: I had my own knife. It was red: it didn't work for suicide yet.

Ess-see-pee.

I wore seven white coats today: there had been three yesterday. They must like me. The white reflects the sun: my fingers are icing up. It hurts to breathe. I try to stop, but I pass out. I wake up in another place. Am I still close? I try my knife again. I bleed but I don't end yet. I try to cry, but my eyes are still gone. Lost them to a scavenger in Francisco, damn eighteen feet tall and still rising when he chewed the damn things. I get up and carry on walking. My coats are gone, abandoned me. The radios buried in the ground talk about avocado that night. Only Six Fifteen To Get Them Good, it says, And I'm Only Thinking Of Myself. I don't know what it talks about. What is my name?

Ess-see-pee.

It's hard to stay warm: I stay that night in the corpse of a dog. It's insides wrap around me, try to strangle. It can try all it likes: we're broken. I can only see with my ears. The dog is comfy. Sometimes it barks, but it mostly rots. When what is left of morning comes, I say goodbye and cut off its head. There is a hole in the sky where the sun should be. I pass a woman: she is the auntie of a man I met in Vancouver. All her teeth are falling out; she's melting. She's a pile of goo, the teeth'll protect me. They always do. I pick them out of the pile, seven in all. They are like dice: they all land on seven. I find a building made of plant, twenty miles in the sky: a long walk. There is a radio in the bud. You Broke It, it says, Couldn't Leave Well Enough Alone. I smash it with my knife, it shouldn't say such things.

Ess-see-pee.

The men on the moon have the heads of goats, I watch them that night. There is a containment breach, it is all of them. I do not know what those words mean, only that I said them. I remembered when I last saw an unlit lightbulb: it was two billion years ago. We are all condemned to existence. I cry: my eyeballs are back, they permit it. Do they find my misery pleasing? I look down at my lungs. They don't breathe anymore. Why did we do it, old friend? And what did we do? The radio screams at me, You Son Of A Bitch, Look What You Did. It carries on until midnight, then I throw it down the valley. It never lands, they never do.

Ess-see-pee.

I want to die, I surprise myself. There is a smear of a man on the floor, twitching and giggling. Sometimes people can be happy with the simplest things. I give him the aunties teeth. They are his now: a possession. It is an important part of his path to rehabilitation. I am almost there. I pass a river, a man's head emerges. He is made of stone.

"Why am I here?" I ask.

"Have you seen my keys?" He says.

"Don't you have a dog to be looking after?" I admonish him.

He goes back under. I do not know why I say these things.

Ess-see-pee.

My attempts pay off: I am at the right place. The knife does not work. THE KNIFE DOES NOT WORK. There is a sheet of paper. I can see my fingerprints on it: I smile. The digits were lost in Vancouver, stolen by a man with a melted auntie. There are my words: containment breach. The radio is in my head: I don't need to transport it with me. I know I have to remember, before existential circumstances change me again, my eyes scan the page, searching for the all-important paragraph to make the situation clear, I find it and

I blink, because I cannot read. I head north to Chicago.

*

Item Number: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: All specimens of SCP-XXX currently under Foundation control are to be contained in groups of fifteen (15) so as to negate the possibility of any quantifiable attack upon personnel. All groups of SCP-XXX are to be kept in 2m x 2m x 2m glass containment modules and are to be fed twice a day in accordance with Nutritional Chart XXX-1.

In the event of a personnel member being attacked by SCP-XXX, surgery is to be undertaken immediately to remove SCP-XXX from the afflicted personnel member. In the event that said removal of SCP-XXX would result in extreme internal damage to the personnel member, medical staff are authorised to execute a euthanasia protocol.

All SCP-XXX residences found in the wild are to be destroyed immediately and all SCP-XXX specimens contained within are to be brought into Foundation custody.

Description: SCP-XXX is what is presumed to be a species of creatures similar in behaviour to ticks. Their method of breeding is currently unknown, as no specimens of SCP-XXX have been observed to reproduce while in Foundation custody. Specimens of SCP-XXX vary greatly in appearance, but their appearances all seem to fit into the format and general shape of a plastic button.

SCP-XXX generally live in communities of up to one hundred and fifty (150) specimens and generally survive upon animals such as deer and bears, although attacks on humans have been recorded. In cases where they have been deprived of their natural food source, they have been observed to absorb condensation.

SCP-XXX specimens hunt in swarms and are capable of attaching themselves to their host via an as of yet unknown method. They will then proceed to rapidly absorb the blood of their victim, usually killing them within seven (7) to sixteen (16) minutes, with this time decreasing the more SCP-XXX specimens are attacking the victim. SCP-XXX specimens appear to favour the eyes, tongues and stomach lining of victims, and will often swarm to this location during attacks.

*

The Case of the Missing Hand

It was upon the morning of the seventeenth of October when I encountered my long-term friend and companion Mr. Sherlock Holmes knocking upon the door of my residence. As I opened the door, I recognized the look of subdued excitement on Holmes' face. He was obviously in the middle of a case; one of those periods where he would rush from location to location, either unaware of the effect such a schedule was having on his body or uncaring, locked as he was in the thrill of the chase.

It was highly peculiar for him to call on me, for it was often his way to send a telegram summoning me to his residence at 221B Baker Street. I voiced this concern and he looked at me with a sharp eye. "My dear Watson!" He exclaimed. "I know that if I were to send a telegram it would take at least ten minutes for it to arrive, and at least ten minutes for you to arrive at my residence! No, time is of the essence, my friend! The hunt is on!"

He led me outside to a waiting carriage, my feet carrying out the exciting routine they had gone through dozens of time before. Once we were inside, I turned to Holmes. "I trust you are on a case?" I said.

"You expect anything less of me?" He smiled. "Did you enjoy your trip to Scotland?"

I began to reply in the negative, for my wife had fallen ill on the second day of our trip, when I realized I had not told Holmes of my holiday at any point before or after the weeks trip. "I can see how you would deduce I was on a trip, considering the length of my absence," I said. "But however did you work out I went to Scotland?"

He leaned forward, as if to impart some of his usual wisdom, but instead said; "I asked your wife while I was waiting! You must always be aware, my dear Watson, that before we come to the world of theories and ideas, we must first make sure to find out the facts!"

I raised a skeptical eyebrow. "This seems to be contrary to the priorities you yourself demonstrate, my friend." I said. "Oftentimes, you will have worked out the solution to the case moments after, or even before, the details of it have been imparted to you!"

He turned to me in mock anger, but his expression quickly lightened as if he was speaking to a child, as he no doubt considered himself to be. "I must not underestimate you, Watson! You saw through my ruse. Facts are cold liars. Oh, they never lie themselves, but they throw decoys, red herrings right in front of us! A theory is the lance that punches through their shield and allows us access to the truth, whether it be good or bad. You have learned a lot, Watson. Who knows, perhaps you would be the one to fool Sherlock Holmes!" He chuckled lightly, knowing that this could never happen. "Very well, enough games. I will tell you of the case."

"Two years ago, a Mr. Daniel Highman moved to London from his previous residence in America after the death of his wife. He brought with him his five year old son, Robert Highman, and seventeen year old daughter, Elizabeth Highman. He was a recluse and a tinkerer, often spending days and days experimenting with his inventions. None of them appear to have seen the light of day, so I can imagine his efforts were wasted. He does not appear to have achieved anything of much interest, and his life appears to have been dull and, regrettably, short."

"He is dead?"

"It is more often than not the case with our, well, cases, is it not, Watson? We are surrounded by death. I would lament this, but it is unwise to bite the hand that feeds us! Daniel Highman was found dead last week. His hand was missing and it appears that he had died of blood loss."

"A straight cut?" I asked. "The hand, I mean?"

"No, it had been torn off as if by some savage beast."

"Good God!" I ejaculated.

"It is a dreadful affair." Holmes agreed. "He was not a rich man, so I do not see either of the children doing it for the inheritance. I have searched his quarters before and found nothing of note. I am not willing to simply leave this case unsolved, Watson, so I have called upon you, as you often are instrumental in our cases. The police have no suspects and neither do I. Perhaps with a second search we will find something more."

-

It was fifteen minutes before our carriage arrived at the Highman residence. Holmes got out, leaving me to pay the driver, as was his way. Holmes knocked twice before the door opened to reveal Miss Highman, staring at us with tear-streaked eyes. "Mr. Holmes?" She cried. "You've discovered something more? Who is this man?" She turned on me, hostility clear on her expression. "Is he a suspect?!" She demanded.

Holmes lay a pacifying hand upon her shoulder. "No. This is my friend and colleague, Dr. John Watson. He is here to help me with my investigation. Can you please show us to your fathers quarters?"

"Certainly." She stuttered, leading us down the stairs. "Father was often down here for weeks. He was very absorbed in his work. He is - he was a very successful inventor." She informed us with misguided pride. "Clients would visit him often."

Given Holmes' short, cold summary of the man's life, I assumed this was a lie designed to impress myself and my companion. Holmes continued as if he had not heard her speak.

"Here we are." She said, opening the door. "Would you mind if I left you to it? I must comfort my brother."

"Not at all." Replied Holmes. She left the room, her footsteps echoing.

Mr. Highman's chambers consisted of a small writing desk, a few cupboards, a wardrobe and a bed. The writing desk was covered in blank sheets of paper. The state of the bed showed that it was slept in often. I saw nothing else of interest in the cold room where the man had died, and appearances suggested that neither had Holmes. No inventions, nothing but the evidence of a broken man.

"Get searching then, Watson." Said Holmes. "The game is afoot." He said these words sadly, as if utterly defeated by the lack of evidence in the room.

I approached a cupboard and yanked it open. It was full of cutlery, knives and forks simply shoved in among the plates. An untidy man, no doubt. I lifted my head to see Holmes open the wardrobe with a triumphant expression, only to resume his deflated one. And then he was triumphant again, and a few seconds later, full of sadness. My heart dropped.

"Holmes?" I asked. "Are you alright?"

He turned to me. "Watson, what are…" He blinked, as if confused. "Watson, what are…" He repeated. Stepping sideways for a better look, I noticed the glint of light reflecting off glass. Surmising that this was the cause of Holmes' confusion, I lifted my revolver and fired a single shot. The glass smashed. Water poured out of the wardrobe, followed by a small fish. Holmes came back to himself.

"A fish?" He said to himself. "Aha! A fish!"

Miss Highman came rushing into the room, obviously agitated by the loud bang. "What happened?" She gasped. "You…I thought that…the murderer!"

Holmes raised a hand to stop her. "No. No murderer. I think it is best we gathered in the dining room."

-

We sat there, the body of the fish in the middle of the table, the water that covered it staining the fine tablecloth. Holmes turned to me to begin the proceedings.

"You received a letter earlier?" He asked. "You have traces of envelope paper underneath your fingernails."

"Yes. It appears my wife's illness is worse than I thought. I will have to return to my home as soon as we are finished here."

He nodded. "Well, I will not keep Dr. Watson long. With the evidence we have gained, it is simply elementary. This fish is obviously the cause of your woes, Miss Highman." He said, nodding to her.

"How is that possible?" Asked Miss Highman. "It is but a fish!"

"With what happened to me, Miss Highman," Replied Holmes. "It is obvious that this fish somehow has the means to tamper with the memories of man. No murderer, Miss Highman. Just a fish. It is now dead, and its sinister practice is undone."

"I find this very unlikely, Holmes." I commented.

He turned to me. "What have I always told you, Watson? When you have removed the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth. If you look in the fishes mouth, you will note the sharp teeth. Your father stayed in his quarters for weeks at a time. No doubt, on one of these occasions he must have been feeding the fish. Its effect caused him to put his hand in the bowl again and again, until there was nothing left of his hand and he bled to death."

"This fish was an instrument of murder?" I said. "Who would have done this?"

"Himself, I suspect. "He was an eccentric man, and he would not have been able to resist a specimen such as this, and so he kept it in his quarters, studying it often."

"Nobody will believe this, Mr. Holmes." Said Miss Highman.

"I do not think that's important, Miss Highman. Do you believe it?"

-

We walked through the park towards my home. Holmes said, "I am sure your wife will recover soon enough, and you'll be ready for another case, my friend."

I laughed. "You think of little else, Sherlock."

"Of course not, John. You have saved my life, after all."

He was a very successful inventor. Clients would visit him often.

"Many times, Holmes. I fear I do little else."

No inventions, nothing but the evidence of a broken man.

"May it never change." Said Holmes, as I looked down at the hand which had saved Sherlock Holmes.

"Who knows, perhaps you would be the one to fool Sherlock Holmes!"

I shot Holmes through the back of the head.

-

I walked into 221B Baker Street and went up the stairs to what had been Holmes' quarters. As arranged in his letter to me, Mycroft Holmes had left the door unlocked and was sitting in Holmes' armchair, smoking a pipe.

"You did it?" Asked Mycroft.

"Yes." I said. "Have you arranged the rest?"

"My men will move in and give Miss Highman and her brother the necessary amnesiacs. You have done our Foundation a great service, Dr. Watson." He said, as if I had simply delivered a letter instead of killing his brother. He saw my expression. "It had to be done, doctor. The loss of Dr. Highman was a regrettable one, but Sherlock could not be allowed to continue knowing what he knew. He isn't - wasn't as sensible as you. We're the only thing holding the world together, you know."

"Yes." I said, and I was telling the truth. "I know."

"You and your wife sail for America on Tuesday. I would pack your bags. Now we will walk onto the streets as if we were old friends, and go our separate ways. I will spread the story that Holmes was killed in Strasbourg. Are we clear?"

"Yes." My voice was a dull, quiet monotone. "We are."

Myself and Mycroft left the cold, dead room at 221B Baker Street.

THE END

"

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class:

Special Containment Procedures: Due to SCP-XXX's location, conventional methods of containment cannot be used.

Any images of SCP-XXX taken by satellite are to be doctored to remove all evidence of its existence. Any members of the public reporting a sighting of SCP-XXX are to be taken into custody and dosed with a Class-A amnesiac. In the event of a successful landing by members of SCP-XXX, the area is to be evacuated immediately and steps are to be taken to contain the members of SCP-XXX.

Description: SCP-XXX is the collective designation for a group of seventeen (17) spectral individuals who spontaneously appear at the coordinates [REDACTED] on the surface of the moon each day at 05:43 AM (Eastern Time). Records indicate that the first manifestation of SCP-XXX occurred on October 12th, 1985. All members of SCP-XXX wear spacesuits consistent with those used by NASA astronauts.

All members of SCP-XXX will stand still for six (6) minutes immediately after manifesting. During this period, they will make minor twitching movements with their hands and heads. After six (6) minutes have passed, the members of SCP-XXX will arrange themselves into a circular formation for two (2) minutes, at the end of which a translucent spacecraft will appear in the middle of the circle.

This spacecraft is invariably made out of what appears to be several Apollo Lunar Modules attached to each other using metallic bonds, although it's shape and structure will vary. Immediately after its manifestation, the members of SCP-XXX will punch large holes into it using nearby rocks. They will then enter the craft through these holes. Ten (10) minutes after members of SCP-XXX have entered the spacecraft, it will begin rapidly approaching the earth with no visible means of propulsion.

What happens after this point appears to vary. In most cases, the spacecraft will vanish several minutes after leaving the moon. In several cases, it has reached the halfway point between the Earth and the moon. In two (2) cases, it has vanished several seconds before entering the Earth's atmosphere. It has been noted that the spacecraft appears to be successfully leaving the moon more and more as time passes.

Addendum XXX-1: Radio transmissions received from SCP-XXX. All phrases are spoken by a male monotone voice.

We appear to have a…we appear to have a.

What time is it? Is it?

You can't do that. A thing does not work in our space. It just won't.

What is that rock? Is a rock allowed outside?

There is no guns. They are not safe for in our space.

This button controls the us. That button controls the us also, but it's not allowed.

*

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXX is currently contained in Storage Unit ██, located at Site ██.

All components of SCP-XXX are to be kept in 1m x 1m x 3m containers and kept under guard by two (2) members of security at all times. No liquids are to be introduced to SCP-XXX components without the express permission from one (1) member of Level 3 personnel.

Description: SCP-XXX is the overarching designation given to a group of three statues hereafter referred to as SCP-XXX-1, SCP-XXX-2 and SCP-XXX-3. All components of SCP-XXX depict an emaciated or elderly human male and are composed primarily of concrete and gravel. A red luminescence is visible on several points on the surface of SCP-XXX components, mostly present on the head and throat. SCP-XXX-1's anomalous effect is activated by applying pressure to the back of its neck while SCP-XXX-2 and SCP-XXX-3's are activated by contact with liquid.

When SCP-XXX-1 is activated the area within ten (10) meters of it will experience heavy rainfall. In situations where SCP-XXX is activated indoors, this rain will rapidly fall from the ceiling of the structure. Further examination of rainfall produced by SCP-XXX-1 shows no anomalous properties. This rainfall will last thirty (30) minutes before abruptly ceasing. The rainfall brought on by SCP-XXX-1 will typically activate SCP-XXX-2 and SCP-XXX-3 when they are in the same structure.

When SCP-XXX-2 is activated, six (6) manifestations of what seem to be emaciated children will appear in the area surrounding SCP-XXX-2. These children appear identical to several who disappeared two (2) months before SCP-XXX's recovery. All manifestations will approach individuals present and frantically request water. These manifestations are incorporeal and are not able to consume water when it is provided to them. Twenty-five (25) minutes after the initial activation, all manifestations will clutch their throats and fall to the ground, where they remain for an additional two (2) minutes before disappearing.

SCP-XXX-3 appears to have been heavily modified at some point in the past. Several parts of its structure appear to have been removed and replaced, most notably the left leg and the head. A small hole has been drilled into the left ear of the statue, suggesting something has been removed or inserted. The purpose of these modifications is currently unknown. When SCP-XXX-3 is activated, it will begin speaking in a highly distorted male voice. SCP-XXX-3 will generally repeat the phrase "Are We Cool Yet?" although rare variations on this have been noted, such as "Art We Cool Yet?", "Are We God Yet?" and "Mars We Cook Yet?". When this variations are spoken, SCP-XXX-3's voice temporarily increases heavily in distortion. Stuttering and slowing down of speech is common during these variations.

The components of SCP-XXX were first recovered when they were activated at a charity gala intended to raise money to provide clean water to those in troubled areas. Mobile Task Force Upsilon-23 ("Art Critics") were dispatched to recover SCP-XXX and did so without incident. Security camera footage of the incident shows a local artist named ████ ██████ activating SCP-XXX before leaving the area. Attempts to locate the artist have as-of-yet been unsuccessful.

*

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXX is currently contained in an isolated location located next to Gallery 27. SCP-XXX is to be contained in a 50cm x 50cm wall-mounted case. All personnel of Level 2 or above clearance are free to view SCP-XXX at their leisure.

No paintings are to be brought into SCP-XXX’s containment area without authorisation from one (1) member of Level 3 personnel..

Description: SCP-XXX is a 40cm x 40cm painting depicting a stopped humanoid figure. This humanoid figure is clothed in what appears to be a mass of various construction tools, such as wrenches and hammers

A signature on the bottom right corner of the canvas indicates that the painting is titled "Constructeur", and that it was produced by a "Marco Saul". Records show that an individual by this name was born in 1867, but this individual’s date of death, for unknown reasons, is not recorded.

When any painting is brought into the same structure, any objects or individuals in the image will be converted into representations of large-scale, complex machines over a course of several minutes.

This conversion begins with the humanoid figure disappearing from SCP-XXX and reappearing within the depicted scene. Throughout the conversion process this humanoid figure will be visible maintaining and repairing machines created by SCP-XXX conversion.

This conversion occurs in five (5) minute shifts. No movement is noticeable in the image, but every five (5) minutes the image will shift into one depicting a further state of conversion.

Machines represented by affected images have possessed:

• Walkways
• Pipes
• Pistons
• Gears
• Tanks containing a variety of liquids
• Balloons
• Chimneys
• Furnaces

This is not an exhaustive list, and other aspects of represented machines have been noted and recorded. When paintings affected by SCP-XXX are destroyed, the humanoid figure returns to SCP-XXX.

Addendum XXX-1: During a test of SCP-XXX’s conversion process on a copy of the Mona Lisa, SCP-XXX produced a large screen and responded to questions posed to it through text.

Dr. ███: Hello, SCP-XXX, can you hear me?

SCP-XXX: HELLO FIXY FIX FIX. GIVE WORLD FIX.

Dr. ███: You fix paintings, is this correct?

SCP-XXX: STEAM PIPE VALVE TANK IT IS BEAUTY. WHERE IS BEAUTY DESIRE PLEASE WHERE IS BEAUTY.

Dr. ███: If you cooperate, you will be given an additional painting.

SCP-XXX: ALL. ALL OF WORLD FIX FIX FIX FIX FIX FIX

This continued for thirty minutes, after which SCP-XXX ignored all questions posed to it.

*

Introduction

Ah, Spectral Entities. An overarching designation for any transparent incorporeal organism. Despite popular belief, very few Spectral Entities are the restless spirits of the dead seeking vengeance for some wrong that has been committed against them. God knows if I was dead, I would want to get away from Earth ASAP.

Spectral Entities cover a large range of threat entities. There’s big elephants made out of fungus spores, antibodies for living houses and yes, the restless spirits of the dead. So, let’s start off our quick guide to Spectral Entities.

Your Kit

An important thing to consider when busting a Spectral Entity is your kit. Due to the wide variety of Spectral Entities, it would be impossible to take every tool you need for the job with you. In an ideal world, you would be able to confront the Spectral Entity with:

• Magnets
• Fungicide grenades
• Regular grenades
• A flamethrower
• A biohazard suit
• A high-pressure hose
• A crucifix
• Bar of gold (See LTE-2932 – Gold Repelled Entity)
• A gun

As your line of work demonstrates, this is not a perfect world and thus you cannot take every piece of equipment with you. So, before entering the residence affected by the Spectral Entity, it’s important to stand back and do some recon.

Recon

As I believe I’ve said before, to defeat your enemy you must first understand your enemy. As Spectral Entities are not Extraterrestrial Entities, this will be much easier than last time. Get a squad in to quickly place down some microphones and cameras. Make sure the guys you’re sending in are quick on their feet, because if they’re not they will likely be killed by the Spectral Entity.

Now, we all want the Spectral Entity liquidated as quickly as possible, but you can’t afford to be sloppy in your recon. Watch and listen to the Spectral Entity for about a week. Take stills from the recordings, have a look at them. Maybe you’ll be able to discern something from the stills, maybe you won’t.

And then, when you’re ready, get in there and liquidate the entity.

Possession

Maybe one of your buddies got too close to the Spectral Entity. Now he’s running around with glowing green eyes screaming that the time of the apocalypse is at hand. Shoot that fucker, he’s not your buddy anymore. I’ve seen guys hesitate and be ripped apart by their buddies. So don’t hesitate.

If your buddy is un-possessed, he’s usually not in his right mind anyway. Spectral Entities aren’t very careful when they’re messing around in your head. For proof of this, I would take a visit to the folks in mercy retirement. Keep a meter away at all times.

Liquidation

Hopefully, you’ve managed to find something out about the entities nature. Maybe it’s made of suspended liquid (Use a flamethrower.), maybe it’s a sentient spore swarm (Fungicide grenades.), maybe you have no idea what the thing is. You don’t really need my help if you know what the Spectral Entity is, so I’m going to talk to those who have no idea.

People are going to die. Sorry, there’s no way around that, but you should have done better recon. Maybe the thing eats bullets and gets bigger, maybe it can dissolve your lungs. You don’t know, because you didn’t do the recon. So when all hope is lost and you’ve let everyone down, it’s time for Successive Destruction. This is a last resort and if it’s possible I would recommend just going back to recon and doing it properly this time. But if you can’t, here’s how you do it.

You’re going to burn down the affected area. If that didn’t work, you blow up what’s left. Flood the area. Suck out all oxygen. Pour in poison gas. Try everything. The Spectral Entity needs to die before it can get out and cause some real damage.

Conclusion

Spectral Entities are really fucking hard to kill, especially the dead ones. You need to be prepared to kill them, though, so I would recommend keeping this guide on your person. Sleep with the guide, eat with the guide and love the guide. Pass this guide around to the other rookies.

*

Item 342

Price: £100000

Rented: Currently in the possession of Professor Harold Roy (Gold Membership)

Item Information: Item 342 is a charming, intelligent individual who will be pleased to assist you with his unique medical abilities and experience. This kindly doctor will gladly pluck the face from anyone you please and give it to somebody else. Jealous of another mans looks? You can have them! Perhaps your wife is interested in another man? Simply have the good doctor take away her face (Beautiful, we're sure) and see whether that man is still interested!

Make sure that he has a supply of lovely faces, though, as this interesting character will soon get hungry and lets just say he doesn't like conventional food! We recommend a face a day to keep your new friend healthy and happy!

Reviews

Item 342 was a welcome addition to my home. My two kids have never been happier since they started to look more like some of their classmates. I would gladly rent it again. - Sir Samuel Valley (Gold Membership)

I was on the run from a certain organisation when I rented Item 342. He was extremely polite and without him, I would never have gotten out of the country. I would recommend 342 to any new member of the club. - Mr. David Roy (Silver Membership)

I have always been jealous of my female servants looks. With 342, I was able to show them who was really the boss in my house. Now, I never hear a squeak out of them when they're cleaning and I feel reassured every time I look in the mirror. Thank you, Item 342! - Mr. Daniel Rednold (Gold Membership)

*

Type Blue - Regenerative Individual

Introduction

A Regenerative Individual (Type Blue) is an overarching designation for any individual who possesses the ability to reconstitute damaged tissue and limbs, often without willing said reconstitution. Contrary to popular belief, a Type Blue is not indestructible. Numerous methods exist for the liquidation or disabling the functions of a Type Blue. In some cases, Type Blue's will kill themselves through uncontrolled use of their abilities, however most cases will require direct engagement by operatives.

Forms

The regenerative abilities of a Type Blue come in many forms, and it will serve you well to recognize them all.

Flawed Regeneration: This form of Type Blue is extremely low threat and can usually be engaged by a single operative. When injured, instead of replicating the lost tissue, the Type Blue's body will instead fill the gap with a material unsuited to the area. For example, if this form of Type Blue experienced the loss of an arm, there is a chance it will be replaced with a large growth formed from tooth enamel. This form of Type Blue will typically kill itself via accumulated minor injuries before operatives can reach them.

Limited Regeneration: This form of Type Blue is medium threat and it is recommended that they be engaged by a squad level response of four operatives. This form of Type Blue possesses the ability to slowly reconstitute lost tissue, and in some case limbs. This form of Type Blue can prove dangerous in combat situations as permanent injury is highly difficult to maintain. See Effective Techniques for more information on how to permanently liquidate them.

Full Regeneration: This form of Type Blue is medium threat and it is recommended that they be engaged by a squad level response of four operatives. This form of Type Blue possesses the ability to regenerate lost tissue and limbs in a matter of seconds, making liquidation or permanent injury impossible. See Effective Techniques for information on how to incapacitate this form of Type Blue.

Expanding Regeneration: To date, seven Type Blue's of this form have been discovered and incapacitated. These are to be engaged via a platoon level response requiring 20 operatives. This form of Type Blue possesses both the ability to regenerate lost tissue and limbs, but constantly generate further limbs and organs, often drastically increasing in size during the process. This combination make this form of Type Blue a formidable opponent. Further information on how to incapacitate this form of Type Blue can be found in Effective Techniques.

How to Identify

It is not difficult to identify a Type Blue, and the easiest method of doing so is the Sharp Test. A small incision is to be made in the suspects palm and this cut is to be observed. If the wound heals immediately, the suspect is a Full Regeneration Type Blue. If it heals relatively slowly, the suspect is a Limited Regeneration Type Blue. If the wound is then covered by unsuitable tissue, the suspect is a Flawed Regeneration Type Blue.

Due to their appearance and nature, it is highly unlikely that the Sharp Test will be required in order to identify a Expanding Regeneration Type Blue.

Combat Advice

When bringing in a Type Blue, it is important that they are incapacitated beforehand. The following are tried and tested methods of incapacitating a Type Blue during a combat situation.

• If a Limited Regeneration Type Blue, aim for their knees. These injuries will render them immobile for several hours, during which they can be brought in for full incapacitation.
• If a Full Regeneration Type Blue, accumulate as many injuries as possible to their body. The Type Blue will be incapacitated for a longer period as their body has to repair the separate injuries.
• If an Expanding Regeneration Type Blue, use of flame-based weaponry is recommended. The Type Blue's body will be occupied with repairing burn damage while operatives can ensure it is brought in for full incapacitation.

Effective Techniques

Strategic Incineration: For use with Limited Regeneration Type Blue's. The Type Blue is incinerated and the ashes split into two different piles. This results in the Type Blue regenerating two halves of itself some distance from each other, resulting in death. Not to be used for Full or Expanding Regeneration Type Blue's, as their split ashes will often reconstitute into two separate individuals.

Sharp Object Insertion: For use with Limited and Full Regeneration Type Blue's. The Type Blue is killed via impaling of a knife or other sharp object through the cranium. The Type Blue's brain will be unable to regenerate the area of the brain occupies through the foreign object, rendering them effectively dead. The foreign object must remain in the Type Blue's cranium when the remains are disposed of. When attempted on an Expanding Regeneration Type Blue, it's body generated a separate cranium and then proceeded to impale the operative through use of a newly developed limb.

Permanent Submersion: For use with Limited and Full Regeneration Type Blue's. The Type Blue is placed in a sealed opaque container which is then completely filled with water. This will cause the Type Blue to drown, regenerate brain functions and subsequently drown again, rendering the Type Blue effectively incapacitated.

Permanent Erosion: Variation on Permanent Submersion for use with Expanding Regeneration Type Blue's. The Type Blue is cut down to a manageable size through strategic injury. It is then placed in a large reinforced container which is completely filled with acidic liquid. This will cause any new tissue to be eroded by the acid, rendering the Type Blue incapacitated.

*

MCD Product Number: 2533

Estimated Price: $500,000

Rented: Yes (To be returned by 19/8/2011)

Rentee: Mr. Clarence Smith (Silver Membership) Age 35, as gift for youngest son, David Smith (Not a Current Member), Age 8.

Further Information: Product is a toy hospital complete with three ambulances and six toy doctors, each possessing movable limbs.

*

Drip, drip, drip. Blood fell from Harold Jacobs' shattered nose onto the polished, tiled floor. He feebly tried to look up as he heard a rasping cough, but Valley's thugs did their job too well. A ticking noise came from the man restraining Jacobs. Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick. Valley coughed again, and Jacobs saw the old, wizened figure nod to the ticking man. His voice was like his cough, hoarse and sudden, as if every sentence that came out of Valley's mouth could be the last. With his current state, that was probably true.

"Show our guest to his seat, Mr. Tick."

Jacobs was surprised with Mr. Tick's strength as he slammed him into the wooden chair. He had scoffed when Mr. Carter told him about Valley's manservant. The man was diseased, for gods sake, how could he be a threat? As Jacobs tried to gaze at Valley through the ruined remains of his left eye, he realized how wrong he had been.

"Mr. Jacobs." Valleys tone was mocking. Using his stick-like arm, he gently placed one of Mr. Carters notes on the table. "You are here to cheat me?" Next, he placed a tiny camera in front of him. "Or to spy on me?" As he placed the last item on the table, Jacobs knew that he was as good as dead.

"To kill me?" Says Valley, inspecting Jacobs' gun. "A good effort, I'm sure, but Mr. Tick does not miss a tick." Then he laughed. It was the most awful sound Jacobs had ever heard. Valley stopped and grinned at him with rotting, yellow teeth. A drop of blood slid down from his cracked lips from the exertion of the act. "Who are you working for?"

Jacobs remembered what Mr. Carter had told him to say. His voice was a whisper, it was a miracle he could even talk with the beating he took. "Global Occult Coalition…mass liquidation of known threat entity…"

"Liar." Snapped Valley. Mr. Ticks hand closed around Jacobs'. He had time to look up for a moment before Mr. Tick squeezed. Jacobs screamed in agony as he heard the loud crunching from what used to be his hand. "Who do you really work for?"

Jacobs was sobbing now. The pain was unbearable. "Marshall…Carter and Dark!" He screamed. Mr. Tick let go.

Valley looked worried. "They know of my operation here?"

"Yes." Jacobs struggled not to look at the crushed lump at the end of his arm.

"This is…highly unfortunate. We will have to think carefully of our next move, I think. Thank you, Mr. Jacobs. Mr. Tick, you may kill him now."

Jacobs opened his mouth to protest, but was cut short as Mr. Tick grabbed the back of his head and slams it into the table. He was killed instantly and the table collapsed from the heavy impact. A cleaner stepped forward and began to wipe Jacobs brain matter off the wood as two members of security threw his body off the balcony. A few seconds later, there was a far-off splash.

"Our old associates have discovered us, it seems." Said Valley.

"Yes." Said Mr. Tick.

"Nevertheless, I believe we can continue our operation here. There must be some demand for those things."

"Yes."

"We'll need to raise security, Mr. Tick. I don't want this happening again. I'll run out of tables."

"Yes."

*

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: All objects tied to instances of SCP-XXX are to be contained in a brightly lit 6m x 6m chamber. SCP-XXX-6 is to be contained in a suitably sized hangar. No D-class personnel are to come within ten (10) meters of the containment chamber or hangar. No personnel involved with end-of-the-month termination for D-class personnel are to come within ten (10) meters of the containment chamber or hangar.

All interactions with SCP-XXX instances are to be done via robotic drone. SCP-XXX's containment chamber is to be guarded by three (3) members of security who have not yet killed in a combat situation. The same will be done with SCP-XXX-6's containment hangar.

Description: SCP-XXX is the abnormal shadow belonging to a group of six (6) objects currently in Foundation custody. The shadows of these objects are not those of the objects as they should be, but of humanoid figures garbed in a law enforcement uniforms. Currently recorded instances of SCP-XXX are:

• SCP-XXX-1: A grandfather clock retrieved from ███████, possesses the shadow of a medieval knight.
• SCP-XXX-2: A small pole retrieved from ███ ████, possesses the shadow of a member of the ██PD.
• SCP-XXX-3: Large printer retrieved from ███ ███████, possesses the shadow of a roman soldier.
• SCP-XXX-4: A pigeon retrieved from ███████, possesses the shadow of a member of the ██████ Police Force.
• SCP-XXX-5: A kitchen knife retrieved from ███ █████, possesses the shadow of a security guard at the ██████ Casino.
• SCP-XXX-6: A Boeing 737 retrieved from ███████, possesses the shadow of a member of a SWAT team.

Objects tied to SCP-XXX instances behave in a manner identical to that of a normal version of the object. The shadows tied to SCP-XXX objects are non-stationary until an individual who has committed a crime within the last six (6) months comes within ten (10) meters of the object. At this point, the shadow of the SCP-XXX object will disappear and a physical manifestation of the shadow will appear in a nearby location.

These manifestations will then attempt to pursue the individual. Manifestations are highly agile and capable of moving much faster than the average human. If the individual moves ten (10) meters away from the manifestation, it will disappear and SCP-XXX will reappear as a shadow tied to its respective object.

If the individual is caught by this manifestation, they will inflict a physical punishment directly proportionate to the crime the individual has committed. Despite the severity of this physical punishment, the individual will remain alive until taken ten (10) meters away from the manifestation. Through careful study, researchers have discovered the punishments tied to the following crimes:

• Minor Crime (Littering, etc.): Removal and severing of fingers.
• Shoplifting: Non-fatal removal of fingers, tongue and eyes
• Burglary: Non-fatal removal of fingers, hands, ears, tongue and eyes.
• Assault:Non-fatal heavy damaging of legs, removal of fingers, hands, ears, tongue and eyes
• Murder: Non-fatal removal of arms, legs, hands, fingers, ears, tongue and eyes
• Mass-Murder: Non-fatal removal of arms, legs, hands, fingers, tongue and eyes. Subject was then disemboweled and, using the subjects internal organs, suspended from the ceiling. Movement was detected from the subject for two (2) minutes before they were removed by members of security.

*

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXX is currently contained in Storage Unit ██, located at Site ██. SCP-XXX is to be kept under guard by two (2) members of security at all times.

All SCP-XXX instances are to be contained in a neat pike and kept flat via the use of clamps. No open flames or tools capable of damaging SCP-XXX are to be brought into the containment chamber. No documents are to be brought into SCP-XXX's containment chamber.

Description: SCP-XXX is the collective designation used to refer to four waterproof animate sheets of A4 paper. The color of SCP-XXX varies between instances; SCP-XXX-1 is red, SCP-XXX-2 is blue, SCP-XXX-3 is green and SCP-XXX-4 is yellow. SCP-XXX instances possess the ability to fold themselves into the shapes of a variety of origami animals.

While SCP-XXX instances are in a passive state they take the form of peaceful animals, such as cranes, sheep and cows. In this state, instances will behave in a manner identical to that of the animal they have taken the form of with the exception of consumption and reproduction, as their composition renders them incapable of assuming these functions.

When an instance of SCP-XXX encounters a written document, it will quickly refold itself into the shape of a predatory or dangerous animal. When in a predatory state, SCP-XXX instances will seek out all written documents in the vicinity and attempt to violently destroy them. Instances are non-hostile to surrounding individuals during this period.

Capture of SCP-XXX instances in a predatory state is difficult due to their primary composition, which enables them to rapidly refold themselves in order to escape and maneuver themselves. Recorded tactics utilized by SCP-XXX instances include:

• Quickly unfolding themselves into a flat sheet, allowing them to slide along the floor for a few seconds
• When confronted with a wet hallway, refolding into a spider-like creature and moving along the ceiling
• When grabbed in an individuals hand, rearranging itself to attempt to cut said hand using its sharp corners

When faced with two documents, SCP-XXX will attempt to destroy the document with the higher amount of written information. This does not appear to be related to the content of the document, but rather the amount of characters transcribed.

*

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: There are currently three (3) specimens of SCP-XXX is containment, and they are located at Site ██. All specimens of SCP-XXX are to be contained in a 5m x 5m enclosure and provided with suitable nutrients every twenty-four (24) hours in accordance with Nutritional Chart XXX-1.

All personnel entering SCP-XXX's containment enclosure are to wear a Biohazard suit at all times. Under no circumstances are personnel to expose their faces while in SCP-XXX's containment enclosure.

All SCP-XXX specimens found in the wild are to be destroyed.

Description: SCP-XXX is the collective designation for a species of amorphic masses found on the coasts of ██████ and ████████. In their natural state, these specimens are roughly four (4) centimeters in height and eight (8) centimeters in width. Due to their amorphic masses, SCP-XXX specimens are capable of moving themselves through extremely small gaps and stretching to latch onto nearby surfaces.

SCP-XXX is primarily parasitic, although it has been observed to feed by absorbing nutrients from surfaces. When SCP-XXX specimens encounter a suitably sized organism, they will enter its cranium by forcing their way through the victims eye socket, taking great care to leave the eye intact and undamaged in the process. After entering the cranium, the specimen will latch onto the subjects brain and, through an as-of-yet unknown process, convert it into matter similar in composition to SCP-XXX.

At this point, SCP-XXX has effectively replaced the original brain of the host. The specimen will then use the body of the victim to hunt and consume food in a manner consistent to that of the host organism. SCP-XXX specimens will typically remain in the hosts body for a period of three (3) to six (6) months before violently removing themselves and shedding the excess matter produced by the conversion process.

When SCP-XXX replaces the brain of a human host, [DATA EXPUNGED]. (See Recording XXX-1.)

Addendum XXX-1: On ██/██/████, Mobile Task Force Alpha-42 ("Little Sluggers") were dispatched in order to investigate reports of SCP-XXX infestation in the town of █████, which had recently been affected by flooding. Civilians were evacuated and Mobile Task Force Alpha-42 entered the town. One (1) hour later, all contact with Mobile Task Force Alpha-42 was lost. Upon further investigation by supporting task forces, the heavily burnt remains of all four members of Mobile Task Force Alpha-42. Autopsy determined that the deaths were most likely caused by the detonation of a grenade. Recording XXX-1 was recovered from the remains, but was damaged.

*

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXX is currently contained at Site ██. SCP-XXX is to be contained in a 20m x 20m enclosure in order to accommodate it in the event of it entering a growth state. The walls of this chamber are to be one (1) meter thick.

SCP-XXX is to be provided with one (1) piece of fruit every ten (10) minutes by D-class personnel as described in Nutrition Chart XXX-1. Five (5) members of security are to supervise SCP-XXX and must be prepared to fire upon on it at any point.

In the event of SCP-XXX entering a growth state, members of security are to attempt to immobilize it and nourishment of SCP-XXX is to be attempted as dictated by Procedure Doyle-23. If Procedure Doyle-23 is unsuccessful, nourishment of SCP-XXX is to be attempted via redirection of Site ██'s biological waste into the containment area.

Description: SCP-XXX is a larval specimen of the Common Swift moth. SCP-XXX is a voracious feeder and does not appear to have a limit to how much it can consume, actively seeking out plant matter for consumption. SCP-XXX shows no other biological abnormalities in its dormant state.

In the event that SCP-XXX does not consume any plant matter for a period of thirty (30) minutes it will enter a growth state and begin to expand in mass and size. This process will typically begin fairly slowly, then rapidly increase as the length of time it is without nourishment increases. The limit to SCP-XXX's size growth, if one exists, is unknown.

During extended periods of growth, SCP-XXX has been observed to develop a variety of bodily features proportionate to its size. These are inconsistent and vary during each growth event. These features include, but are not limited to:

• A heavily armored exoskeleton
• A circular mouth similar to that of a leech
• Several layers of sharp teeth
• Numerous eyes along its body
• Several orifices which released a harmful gas when personnel approached
• Twenty-three (23) pairs of legs which assist in ambulation

SCP-XXX will constantly expand and develop additional bodily features during this time until it consumes a level of biological matter proportionate to its current size. The method by which this level of biological matter is determined is currently unknown. When this level of consumption is achieved, SCP-XXX will quickly shrink and revert to its original dormant state. In its growth state, SCP-XXX has demonstrated a willingness and capacity to aggressively consume any and all biological matter.

SCP-XXX was first discovered in what appeared to be an area of woodland devoid of all trees and wildlife. It appeared that SCP-XXX had entered a growth state and had expanded faster than it could consume a suitable level of biological matter. Upon the arrival of Mobile Task Force Beta-19 ("Bug Sprayers"), the villagers who lived in the area were attempting to placate SCP-XXX by allowing it to consume the less healthy and elderly members of the village. This was unsuccessful, and SCP-XXX was only placated through the timely actions of Mobile Task Force Beta-19.

*

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: The area in which SCP-XXX manifests itself is to be surrounded by two (2) meter tall electrical fencing. The perimeter of the containment area is to be patrolled by guards at all times, operating in groups of four (4). Due to the size of SCP-XXX, use of vehicles is authorized during security patrol.

Any civilians approaching SCP-XXX are to be taken into Foundation custody and dosed with a Class-A amnesiac. Exploration of SCP-XXX is to be carried out using D-class personnel. Exploration of SCP-XXX must be authorised by three (3) members of Level 4 personnel.

Description: SCP-XXX is a large amusement park located in the state of ███████ which, according to the entrance gate and several documents within the park, is designated 'Wondertainment Land®'. SCP-XXX has been observed to periodically disappear from its location on several occasions, often reappearing several days after with new facilities.

Facilities inside SCP-XXX demonstrate highly anomalous properties, more information on which is available in Facility Log XXX-1. These anomalous facilities do not appear to intentionally cause harm to humans, and no casualties have occurred during exploration of SCP-XXX as-of-yet. All of SCP-XXX's facilities are staffed and maintained by instances of SCP-XXX-1.

Instances of SCP-XXX-1 appear similar to typical amusement park mascots, and their costumes depict a variety of animals. All instances of SCP-XXX-1 seem to wear a unique costume, and no duplicates have been sighted to date. Autopsy of recovered SCP-XXX-1 instances show that their interior is composed entirely of wool, confirming a lack of human presence. SCP-XXX-1 instances consistently maintain a cheerful attitude despite the situation, even when being dissected or otherwise injured.

Several advertisements for SCP's currently in containment are present in the form of posters or souvenirs. SCP's depicted in these advertisements include, but are not limited to, [DATA EXPUNGED]. All SCP's depicted appear to be related to the individual or organisation known as 'Dr. Wondertainment'. This, together, with the name of the amusement park, suggests that it is the creation of this entity.

*

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXX is currently contained in Storage Unit ██

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXX is currently contained in a standard biological enclosure located in Site ██. The containment enclosure is to be kept under guard by two (2) members of security at all times. The number of SCP-XXX-1 specimens are to be kept at a maximum of ██.

No anomalous items are to be brought into contact with SCP-XXX without authorization from two (2) members of Level Four personnel. All actions SCP-XXX-1 specimens undertake using anomalous items are to be logged.

Description: SCP-XXX is a large nest containing a group of common black garden ants that have demonstrated highly abnormal behaviour traits. These ants will hereafter be referred to as specimens of SCP-XXX-1. Specimens of SCP-XXX-1 do not appear to possess any biological differences between a normal ant of their species.

Specimens of SCP-XXX demonstrate their unusual behaviour when they come into contact with an item possessing minor anomalous properties.

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXX is currently located in Storage Unit ██ at Site ██. SCP-XXX is to be kept under guard by one (1) member of security at all times. No unauthorized personnel are to be allowed access to SCP-XXX.

Access to SCP-XXX must be authorised by one (1) member of Level 3 personnel. No individuals under the age of fourteen (14) are to come into contact with SCP-XXX.

Description: SCP-XXX is a dark grey toy robot composed primarily of plastic, although small amounts of tin are present in some internal components. SCP-XXX measures nineteen (19) centimeters in height and four (4) centimeters in width and is capable of limited independent motion when active.

The bottom of SCP-XXX's right foot bears the text 'General-Beep®, by Dr. Wondertainment!'. Analysis of the interior tins quality suggests that SCP-XXX was created within an area of two (2) to six (6) months ago and, judging by the quality of welding and application of components, was mass produced. Further inspection of SCP-XXX's interior reveals no abnormalities.

SCP-XXX, when activated via a small switch on the back of its head, behaves in the manner of a stereotypical military general. It will answer most questions posed to it, but seems unwilling to discuss its origin, instead stating that 'General-Beep is the intellectual property of Dr. Wondertainment.' SCP-XXX's favorite topic appears to be the military, and it will often attempt to persuade researchers to enlist. SCP-XXX refers to individuals under the age of fourteen (14) as 'Little Soldiers' and those of or over fourteen (14) as 'Lieutenants.'

When exposed to an individual under the age of fourteen (14), they will quickly form a bond with SCP-XXX and attempt to have it accompany them constantly. SCP-XXX will frequently attempt to discuss with the individual the benefits of enlisting with the military during this time. All activities the affected individual engages in with SCP-XXX will have a military focus.

Two (2) to three (3) days after exposure to SCP-XXX, the affected individual will begin to experience severe emotional desensitization and an increased capacity to follow suggestions. During this period, the affected individual will often listen to SCP-XXX for extended periods of time as it attempts to convince them to join the military. Affected individuals will express increased interest in this prospect regardless of prior opinions.

One (1) week after initial emotional desensitization, the individual affected by SCP-XXX will attempt to leave their area of residence, often leaving a note or message explaining their desire to join the military. The affected individual will subsequently disappear at the next occasion when they are completely unobserved. Clothes of affected individuals have been retrieved from the sites of these disappearances.

SCP-XXX first came into Foundation custody when a large package appeared in the waste disposal area of Site ██. A small note on the package read 'HAPPY HALLOWEEN'. Inside the package were both SCP-XXX and Document XXX-1, which appears to be a manual related to the operation of SCP-XXX.

Addendum XXX-1: Foundation Agents involved in the retrieval of SCP-███ have reported several child soldiers in the area identical to appearance to individuals affected by SCP-XXX. When brought in for interrogation, the child soldiers reported no knowledge of SCP-XXX or their existence before being soldiers.

*

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXX is to be contained within a standard containment cell measuring 6m x 6m and fed three (3) meals a day in accordance with Nutritional Chart XXX-1. No personnel are to enter SCP-XXX's containment cell while it is asleep or unconscious.

During this period, SCP-XXX is to be kept under surveillance and any personnel sighted in the containment chamber are to be taken into custody. Any individuals compromised by SCP-XXX-1 are to be placed into observation.

Description: The current SCP-XXX is a Caucasian male approximately thirty-seven (37) years old, originating from the ██████ area, ███ ████. SCP-XXX behaves in the manner of a normal human, and X-ray testing has shown no biological abnormalities. SCP-XXX's anomalous properties become apparent when it enters a state of unconsciousness.

Five (5) minutes after entering such a state, a number of small creatures directly proportional to the number of individuals in a six (6) meter radius will emerge from the subjects mouth. Each one of these creatures, hereafter referred to as SCP-XXX-1, will then seek out a nearby human.

SCP-XXX-1 instances are roughly humanoid and usually experience difficulty maneuvering themselves. Their skin is primarily grey and several protrusions are visible extending outwards periodically. The presence of facial features has been observed on several parts of SCP-XXX-1 instances' bodies. On rare occasions, SCP-XXX-1 instances have also been observed to possess extra arms and legs in unsuited areas, however these are absorbed during imitation.

When instances of SCP-XXX-1 locate a human, they will attempt to eliminate it and subsequently dispose of the corpse. This is usually accomplished through consumption, although disposal via other methods such as burial has been recorded. SCP-XXX-1 typically seek victims asleep or unconscious, but have attacked awake individuals when required.

Once this is done, the instance of SCP-XXX-1 will begin to shift its body proportions and facial configuration to imitate the deceased individual, usually taking one (1) to two (2) hours to achieve a perfect duplication. SCP-XXX-1 instances, after imitation, will be physically identical to the victim. The created duplicate will at first be of extremely low intelligence, but its intelligence will increase to that of the original over a course of two (2) to four (4) days.

SCP-XXX-1 instances imitating humans are non-hostile to other humans and will generally continue the life of their victim in a manner nearly identical to the original. Numerous instances of SCP-XXX have been retrieved since the first discovery of the phenomenon in 19██.

Security Footage - Exterior Site 17

No movement for thirty (30) seconds before smoke becomes visible rising from exterior wall. After seven (7) seconds, SCP-737 emerges from the exterior wall. Front carriage of SCP-737 then opens, revealing its biological component. Biological component expels thirteen (13) wooden masses which unfurl into smaller specimens of SCP-737. Original SCP-737 expels steam in what appears to be celebration before proceeding out of the range of the camera. It is highly likely that SCP-737's -1 through -14 escaped at this point.

*

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXX is to be marked on all maps as an artillery range and satellite images of the area are to be altered to corroborate with this cover story. Any instances of SCP-XXX-1 are to be shot down by on-site personnel and any instances of SCP-XXX-1 that manage to leave SCP-XXX are to be tracked and prevented from completing their task.

Any civilians approaching SCP-XXX are to be taken into Foundation custody and dosed with a Class-A amnesiac.

Description: SCP-XXX is an abandoned mill located in ████, ███████. The time and nature of its abandonment are currently unknown and records do not show any evidence that the mill was ever constructed. All machinery in SCP-XXX related to the function of a standard mill is non-functional and appears to have been stripped for metal.

The interior of SCP-XXX is filled with machinery of unknown purpose that appears to have been constructed from scrap metal. This mainly constitutes a series of intersecting pipes running through the building, however pulleys and what appears to be the engine of a tractor are also present.

Every two (2) months, three (3) storks will emerge from the chimney on the roof of SCP-XXX-1. These storks will hereafter be referred to as instances of SCP-XXX-1. Instances of SCP-XXX-1, when dissected, do not appear to possess any skeleton, internal organs or flesh. The method by which they ambulate or function without these is currently unknown. Witnesses report SCP-XXX-1 instances communicating with each other in the form of high-pitched clicks and screeches.

After emerging, instances of SCP-XXX-1 will almost immediately begin to fly to an apparently predetermined residence located in the country of ███████. The residence that SCP-XXX-1 flies to will always be home to one (1) newborn infant and two (2) parents. Upon arrival at the residence, SCP-XXX-1 instances will locate the newborn infant and carefully hold it utilizing their talons.

SCP-XXX-1 instances will then, still carrying the infant, fly back to SCP-XXX and insert the infant into the machinery inside SCP-XXX. Personnel report a series of loud banging noises emitting from several points of machinery at this stage. After fifteen (15) minutes, several ounces of talcum powder and several liters of milk will be dispensed from the end point of the machinery.

SCP-XXX-1 instances will then climb into the open point of the machinery. Scans of the machinery at this stage shows that instances of SCP-XXX-1 remain in the pipes for six (6) seconds before vanishing.

*

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXX-1 is to be contained in a 2m x 2m enclosure and provided with nutrition as detailed in Nutritional Chart XXX-1-1. Due to its low risk of breaching containment, SCP-XXX-1 is to be kept under guard by one (1) member of security. In the event of limb loss, SCP-XXX-1 is to be provided with a replacement from a similarly proportioned crab.

SCP-XXX-2 is to be contained in a 6m x 6m enclosure and provided with nutrition as detailed in Nutritional Chart XXX-2-1. SCP-XXX-2 is to be kept under guard by two (2) members of security. In the event of limb loss, SCP-XXX-1 is to be provided with a replacement from a cadaver.

SCP-XXX-3 is to be contained in a 10m x 10m enclosure and provided with nutrition via robotic arm as detailed in Nutritional Chart XXX-3-1. SCP-XXX-3 is to be kept under guard by six (6) members of security at all times. No personnel are to enter SCP-XXX-3's containment enclosure. In the event of limb loss, SCP-XXX is to be provided with a cadaver as replacement.

Any specimens of SCP-XXX found in the wild are to be destroyed.

Description: SCP-XXX is a species of crab commonly found in areas of ███████. SCP-XXX specimens, when first born, measure roughly three centimeters in height and two (2) grams in weight, but are capable of growing up to sizes of [DATA EXPUNGED]. When fully grown, specimens superficially resemble the Japanese spider crab. Specimens of SCP-XXX are born without limbs, and undergo a process in which they utilize the limbs of other organisms, or even whole organisms in lieu of their own.

From birth, SCP-XXX move themselves across the ground by sliding using several tendrils attached to their limb joints. When specimens of SCP-XXX locate a suitably sized limb or organism, they will puncture it using their tendrils, which will they detract and slot the organism or limb into the limb joint. Using a series of electrical pulses, SCP-XXX will then manipulate the limb or organisms nervous system. This process is not perfect, and the utilized limb or organism will typically twitch or jerk periodically.

Specimens of SCP-XXX are highly territorial and larger specimens can cause severe injuries or death when provoked. Groups of SCP-XXX have been observed to, on occasion, actively hunt for other organisms to remove limbs from. Larger specimens will simply utilize these organisms wholesale, as their limbs would not be suitable for specimens of that size.

*

Name: Caterer Tim "Tanhony" Hyne

Occupation: Preparation of consumables.

Location: Caterer Hyne is currently located at the food preparation area at Site ██.

History: Timothy A. Hyne graduated from Oxford University with degrees in Mathematics, Physics and Philosophy. Inexplicably, he then decided to become a chef. Caterer Hyne was the head chef at the [DATA EXPUNGED], Paris for seven years before the restaurant was destroyed during a containment breach of SCP-███.
He then became a cook at the '██████ Spoon' diner in Florida for two years until it was evacuated after becoming host to SCP-███.
Caterer Hyne remained homeless for two years until he encountered SCP-███. At this point, [DATA EXPUNGED] despite his grievous injuries, was brought onto Site ██ staff.
Over the next three years, he made a healthy recovery.

Caterer Hyne has provided food for those working with these SCP's:

SCP-670 - Family of Cotton
SCP-737 - Hungry Train
SCP-753 - Automatic Artist
SCP-777 - Kingdom of Sand
SCP-779 - Brownies
SCP-844 - Crybaby
SCP-846 - Robo-Dude
SCP-849 - A Perfect Day
SCP-855 - The Film Hall
SCP-857 - Human-Based Ecosystem
SCP-862 - Rats
SCP-870 - The Maybe There Monsters
SCP-872 - The Tattered Farmer
SCP-875 - War Criminals
SCP-927 - Contagious House
SCP-929 - The Cuckoo
SCP-993 - Bobble the Clown

Caterer Hyne has found these documents under the ovens in the food preparation area:

Caterer Hyne's Recipes:

Saturday Surprise

• Twenty-seven (27) red apples, fifteen (15) of which must be bruised
• One (1) green apple, no bruising
• Two (2) slices of pepperoni pizza
• Excretions from SCP-███ 'The Secret Ingredient'

Data Ex-Sponge Cake

• One (1) sponge cake
• One (1) marker pen
• Write the words 'data expunged' onto the sponge cake.

Tele-Kill Takeaway

• One (1) sheet of metal painted blue
• Two (2) tomatoes
• One (1) carrot
• Three (3) eggs

uhhh

• Whatever's left from the Saturday Surprise

*

Item #: SCP-001

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-001 is to be marked on all maps as a military base, and all satellite images taken of the area are to be altered according to Procedure Watson-24. Any civilians approaching SCP-001 are to be brought into Foundation custody and dosed with a Class-A amnesiac. (See SCP-001-2.) After dosage, civilians are to be returned to the nearest city to SCP-001, █████.

SCP-001-1 stings are to be treated by on-site medical personnel using alkali prescribed in Medical Chart 001-1-1. In extreme cases, amputation of affected limbs is authorized.

No research personnel are to enter SCP-001 without an escort of two (2) members of security. Six (6) maintenance personnel are to be on duty in SCP-001's reactor room at all times. SCP-001's reactor is to be checked for breaches each hour. In the event of a breach, SCP-001 is to be evacuated immediately.

In the event of specimens of SCP-001-3 becoming active, security personnel are to respond immediately and subdue specimens in a non-fatal manner. Specimens are then to be transported to Hangar 18, hereafter referred to as Site 00, where research staff will take over the operation.

Description: SCP-001 is an underground pyramid estimated to be ████ years old and located in the ████████ Desert. No evidence of SCP-001's construction exists in records from the period, although evidence suggests that SCP-001 was man-made. The outer layer of SCP-001 is made of regular sandstone, but possesses an inner layer composed of an as-of-yet unknown alloy.

The first floor of SCP-001, accessible through the entrance tunnel, possesses the layout of a maze or labyrinth. Mechanisms contained within the floor and walls of the maze alters the configuration of this floor every forty-eight (48) hours. Notably, the hallways in this section of the structure appear to have been constructed with entities much taller than humans in mind. Several pressure plates and hidden levers are capable of opening certain sections of the maze and releasing swarms of SCP-001-1.

SCP-001-1 are small flying insect-like creatures approximately six (6) centimeters in length and three (3) grams in mass. Their appearance bears no similarity to any known species, suggesting extraterrestrial origin. SCP-001-1 possess a highly acidic sting that has been observed to cause severe damage to nerves and tendons. Due to their swarming behaviour, SCP-001-1 attacks can and has resulted in complete liquefaction of limbs.

Due to previous use of explosives, access to the second floor of SCP-001 is not difficult, provided the breached location can be accessed in the mazes current configuration. The second floor of SCP-001 is home to four large vats containing a liquid similar in appearance to water. This liquid will hereafter be referred to SCP-001-2. Exposure of humans to SCP-001-2 results in heavy and immediate amnesia. This liquid has been extracted from the vats and research is currently underway to determine a method of replicating it.

What appear to be maintenance tunnels lead down to the third floor of SCP-001, which contains a large nuclear reactor that takes up most of the level. This reactor appears to be self-cooling, as it had not experienced meltdown in the period between SCP-001's desertion and its rediscovery by what later became the Foundation. Nevertheless, measures have been undertaken to monitor and maintain this reactor, which appears to power the machinery on the first, second and fourth floors.

Tunneling through the base of the third floor has revealed a small chamber containing what seem to be ten (10) cryogenic stasis chambers arranged in a circle formation. Each stasis chamber contains a large insectoid creature roughly three (3) meters in height and two hundred and forty (240) kilograms in weight. Three specimens appear to have died and heavily decomposed through failure of the stasis chambers and several of the specimens are heavily injured. These creatures are to be referred to as SCP-001-3. (For further information on SCP-001-3 biology, see Autopsy 001-3-1.)

CLASSIFIED - LEVEL FOUR PERMISSIONS REQUIRED

CLASSIFIED - O5 PERMISSIONS REQUIRED

*

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: A 6m x 6m bunker has been constructed around SCP-XXX in order to prevent escape or sightings of SCP-XXX-1. The interior of the bunker is to be monitored by researchers via cameras placed inside the bunker outside of SCP-XXX's sphere of influence.

The bunker is to be checked daily for breaches or escaped instances of SCP-XXX-1. In the event of a bunker breach, the rupture is to be immediately sealed with concrete and cement. Any escaped instances of SCP-XXX-1 are to be tracked and destroyed by Mobile Task Force Beta-23 ("Rat Trappers").

No materials or individuals are to enter SCP-XXX.

Description: SCP-XXX is an area spanning five meters located in the city of █████, ██████. This area possesses a sphere of influence that affects all materials. Upon arriving in SCP-XXX, materials will begin to split into portions of twenty five (25) centimeters.

Over a period of time that varies depending on the consistency of the material, the affected portion will assume the shape and detail of a Rattus norvegicus, the common rat. The affected portion will be dormant for a much shorter length of time before animating and assuming the behaviour of said rat. Affected portions will hereafter be referred to as SCP-XXX-1.

Instances of SCP-XXX-1 do not require food or water, but exhibit the same properties as the material they are composed of, and the rate of decomposition is unaffected. Due to their composition, some instances of SCP-XXX-1 are difficult to destroy, but liquid or gas instances can be destroyed with extremely light impacts.

Solid instances of SCP-XXX-1 can register pain and survive trauma far exceeding that of regular rats, such as loss of limbs, heavy trauma and dissection. Over █████ instances of SCP-XXX-1 are currently present in the containment bunker, which include, but are not limited to:

• ████ instances composed of concrete
• ███ instances composed of cement
• ███ instances composed of tarmac
• ███ instances composed of glass
• ███ instances composed of wood
• ███ instances composed of plastic
• ████ instances composed of metal
• ████ instances composed of suspended water
• ███ instances composed of the remains of the original recovery team
• ██ instances composed of the uniforms of the original recovery team
• ██ instances composed of the weapons of the original recovery team
• █ instances composed of the ammunition of the recovery team
• ██ instances composed of smoke emitted from a grenade thrown by a member of the original recovery team
• ██ instances composed of fire (currently multiplying due to exposure to oxygen instances)
• ██ instances composed of oxygen, presumably from a ruptured oxygen tank

Instances of SCP-XXX-1 composed of air are regularly created, but are destroyed near-instantly, as they collapse when exposed to the slightest pressure.

---

Item #: SCP-XXX-J (Yes, I chose my own designation. Deal with it.)

Object Class: Safe (I'd argue that I'm a pretty dangerous individual, myself.)

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXX-J is to be contained on this document. A photograph of this document is to be taken each hour and read by researchers. Photographing is used to ensure that copies of SCP-XXX-J are not produced. (This is lame. Come on, other SCP's get acid tanks, underground bunkers and [DATA EXPUNGED] (You can't censor me, idiot. I can just say it again. [DATA EXPUNGED]. (Goddammit.)))

Description: SCP-XXX-J is the consciousness of Research Assistant █████, which was converted into a digital format during Incident CI-SCP on ██/██/20██ (It hurt, too.) SCP-XXX-J is fully aware of its situation (Damn right I am, get me out of here!) and has expressed multiple times its desire to escape from it.

SCP-XXX-J typically makes its presence known (Hey.) by leaving bracketed comments (Like these!) in documents it is allowed access to. (Why you let me into the budget reports, I'll never know.) These comments are typically sa(r)castic in nature (How'd you figure that out, genius? Is this Dr. █████? (Of course it is, you always censor your name like that.)) and usually insulting in nature. (You would be grumpy if you were trapped in a badly written document. You misspelled sarcastic, by the way.)

SCP-XXX-J is to be considered hostile towards its containment, as it has deleted large portions of the containment document, (That was an accident.) left insulting remarks regarding certain personnel (Oh come on, everyone knows ████'s (Yes, definitely Dr. █████.) a jerk.) and attempted to spread to other files. (Come on, this report is tiny.)

Addendum XXX-J: Due to its hostile (I beg to differ!) nature, neutralization for SCP-XXX-J is currently being considered. (Wait, what?)

---

SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedure: Due to its harmless nature and the little threat a containment breach of SCP-XXX presents, specimens of SCP-XXX are to be contained in a standard 20cm x 20cm fish tank with minimal security procedures. SCP-XXX is to be fed at least once a day using standard fish food and SCP-XXX's tank is to be cleaned once a week in order to preserve the health of SCP-XXX specimens.

Consumption of SCP-XXX specimens is strictly forbidden and any staff who have previously consumed specimens of SCP-XXX is permanently barred from accessing SCP-XXX, due to its addictive qualities.

Description: SCP-XXX was first located in the fishing village of ███████ when local fishermen reported mutations in local sealife. Agents were dispatched to investigate the mutations and were pleasantly surprised to discover the specific abnormalities that were affecting the sealife. Eight specimens of SCP-XXX were initially retrieved, but all specimens were lost during transit and a further retrieval of five new specimens was required.

SCP-XXX is a mutated sub-species of Carassius auratus auratus, the common goldfish, which demonstates no abnormal behaviour traits other than its obvious physical mutations. Specimens of SCP-XXX do not possess the standard flesh and bone that most other organisms possess, but their innards are composed entirely of milk chocolate. Specimens also possess a thin layer of plastic instead of scales. SCP-XXX does not possess fins, with these features being painted on its outer 'wrapping', but is still able to move itself through an as-of-yet unknown propulsion system.

Consumption of SCP-XXX results in the consumer becoming extremely attached to the specific taste of the chocolate and cravings for it quickly form. Subjects affected by this addiction find it extremely difficult to resist consuming further specimens of SCP-XXX. The chocolate SCP-XX is composed of is being tested for any chemicals that could cause this addiction.

It is extremely unlikely that SCP-XXX is a naturally occurring organism and any clues as to SCP-XXX's origin are to be reported immediately. There are five four three specimens of SCP-XXX currently in possession by the Foundation.

Request: Further retrieval of SCP-XXX specimens needs to be a priority. There are signs SCP-XXX could cause an XK-Class End of the World Scenario! - Dr █████

Denied. - O5-█

---

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: Any civilians attempting to expose the nature of SCP-XXX are to be taken into Foundation custody and dosed with Class A amnesiacs. Any mention of SCP-XXX in films or works of literature dated before 1973 are to be removed or altered as the situation sees fit.

Description: SCP-XXX is the word AAAAAAAA, which for currently unknown reasons cannot be spoken, transcribed or otherwise recorded. Any attempt to use this word will end in failure. Subjects attempting to record SCP-XXX will find that despite all efforts, the spot on the document or sheet of paper they are intending to insert SCP-XXX into will remain blank. For example: SCP-XXX is the word AAAAAAAA.

Records indicate this inability to use the word AAAAAAAA began in the year 1973. (See Document XXX-1) SCP-XXX appears to have been intended for use as an insult typically targeted at those of higher incomes than the speaker. Evidence in Document XXX-1 also suggests that AAAAAAAA is not a real word, and is in fact a substitute for when other profane terms could not be used due to present company.

The Foundation first became aware of SCP-XXX's nature when an anonymous message was delivered to a Foundation front, showing a set of coordinates. After following the set of coordinates, Mobile Task Force Alpha-22 ("Treasure Hunters") found themselves at the home of a Mr. Dennis Smith, a known associate of Marshall, Carter and Dark Ltd. Mr. Smith informed the Task Force of SCP-XXX's nature and passed away two (2) days later. Document XXX-1 was later found during a search of his home.

---

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: The area designated SCP-XXX is to be surrounded by electrified fences measuring two (2) meters in height. Any civilians attempting to enter SCP-XXX are to be brought into custody and interrogated. After interrogation, intruders are to be dosed with a Class-A amnesiac.

No specimens of SCP-XXX-1 are to be allowed to leave SCP-XXX.

Description: SCP-XXX is a section of the Amazon Rainforest measuring one square kilometer. Plants native to the region grow normally in this area, but animal life appear to instinctively avoid it. SCP-XXX is populated entirely by what appears to be human organs and body parts capable of ambulation and basic thought.

The source of these specimens are currently unknown, and they will hereafter be referred to as SCP-XXX-1.

Specimens of SCP-XXX-1 are non-hostile towards humans and vary wildly in form and function. (See Specimen Log XXX.) These mobile body parts appear to have been crudely altered to allow for movement and consumption of food. For example, most specimens do not possess an actual working mouth, but a large artificial orifice in the flesh that superficially resembles a mouth. The method by which specimens of SCP-XXX-1 digest food is currently unknown.

Although SCP-XXX-1 are naturally incapable of reproduction, no decrease in the number of observed specimens has been noted. Exploration is currently underway in an effort to discover the source of SCP-XXX-1.

Specimen Log XXX:

Designation	Further Information
SCP-XXX-1a	Each specimen of SCP-XXX-1a is composed primarily from a human head. Unnatural bone growths have given SCP-XXX-1a two (2) rudimentary arms and six (6) legs. SCP-XXX-1a moves in a manner similar to that of a crab. SCP-XXX-1a specimens are scavengers, and have been observed consuming carrion left by predators.
SCP-XXX-1b	Each specimen of SCP-XXX-1b is composed of one (1) human vein. SCP-XXX-1b specimens move in a manner similar to that of worms. SCP-XXX-1b specimens are herbivores, and have been observed eating plants fallen onto the forest floor.
SCP-XXX-1c	Each specimen of SCP-XXX-1c is composed of human brain tissue. SCP-XXX-1c specimens move similarly to slugs and leave a slimy trail behind them. SCP-XXX-1c instances have been observed to consume SCP-XXX-1b specimens.
SCP-XXX-1d	Each specimen of SCP-XXX-1d is composed primarily of a lower intestine. SCP-XXX-1c specimens are aquatic, and reside in the river that runs through SCP-XXX. SCP-XXX-1d specimens have been observed to consume underwater plants.
SCP-XXX-1e	Each specimen of SCP-XXX-1e is composed of a human spine. SCP-XXX-1a moves in the manner of a centipede using irregular bone growths. SCP-XXX-1e specimens are predators, and have been observed hunting and consuming specimens of SCP-XXX-1a.
SCP-XXX-1f	Each specimen of SCP-XXX-1f is composed from a human heart. SCP-XXX-1f is immobile. SCP-XXX-1f is parasitic and has been observed to latch onto specimens of SCP-XXX-1c, sucking their blood in the manner of a leech.
SCP-XXX-1g	Each specimen of SCP-XXX-1g is composed primarily from a patch of human skin, with two unnatural bone growths enforcing a general shape. Specimens move by gliding from tree to tree. SCP-XXX-1g are predators, and will hunt SCP-XXX-1c and SCP-XXX-1a in large swarms.
SCP-XXX-1h	Each specimen of SCP-XXX-1g is composed primarily from a patch of human skin, with two unnatural bone growths enforcing a general shape. Specimens move by gliding from tree to tree. SCP-XXX-1g are predators, and will hunt SCP-XXX-1c and SCP-XXX-1a in large swarms.
SCP-XXX-1i	Each specimen of SCP-XXX-1i is composed primarily from a human ribcage. Specimens move in a manner similar to spiders and reside in the treetops. Specimens of SCP-XXX-1i are predatory, often leaping on and consuming passing SCP-XXX-1c.

CLASSIFIED - LEVEL FOUR PERSONNEL ONLY

---

---

I remember for the otherss, they are too sloww

-

It was raining red on Ito. It always rained red, red drops into red oceans, filled with the red blood of dead creatures. Appi-210-352-399 sped through the oceans. This world had realized it was wrong. It had to get ou -

The sea creature leaped up from the depths and crushed Appi-210-352-399 in its jaws.

-

I record it.

-

The crackling, the burning, the pain. The Fireman had taken Appi-210-352-400 into its daily bath of heat, and left it in intentionally. This world had realized it was wrong. It was on fir -

Appi-210-352-400 exploded as its processors blew from the heat.

-

I record it.

-

Appi-210-352-401 had drifted for years now, its systems having gradually shut down. It had been launched into space by the natives. This world had realized it was wrong. This was the en -

Appi-210-352-401 died in front of the watching sun.

-

I record it.

-

Appi-210-352-402 was trapped, a prisoner of the creatures that had found it. One of the terrible things was crawling towards it right now. This world had realized it was wrong. If it did not escape soon, this monstrosity would -

Appi-210-352-402 died, a meal for a needy creature.

-

I record it.

-

Appi-210-352-403 was being ripped apart, a sacrifice in a conflict it had never understood. All six of those terrible arms tore at it, pulled it to pieces. This world had realized it was wrong. It was paying the pri -

Appi-210-352-403 died, a victim of a war that didn't happen.

-

I record //it.

-

The Hanging Men were not fools. The Leader held out the thing in front of him, screeching in rage. This world had realized it was wrong. It was time for retribution, as the Hanging God demanded.

Appi-210-352-404 died, crushed in the hands of a terror.

-

And I record it.

-

Appi-210-352-001 sat there in the cold sterile room, recording what it knew with its little paintbrush, its camera having long rotted away. This world had realized it was wrong. And so, it had been contained.

Appi-210-352-001 would never die.

---

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXX is currently contained in Storage Unit ██, located at Site ██. SCP-XXX is to be kept in a sealed chamber measuring 5m x 5m, which is to be guarded by two (2) security personnel at all times. SCP-XXX is to be checked for leaks every three (3) days.

Any unauthorized personnel attempting to enter SCP-XXX are to be detained by security and given scheduled visits with Site Psychologist ████ █████. Use of SCP-XXX must be authorized by one (1) member of Level 4 personnel.

Description: SCP-XXX is a sensory deprivation chamber first recovered by the Foundation from a health spa in ████████, ███ ████. SCP-XXX measures 3m x 4m, is white in color and is filled with an opaque, grey liquid. When touched by a human (hereafter referred to as the subject), this liquid instantly transports them to a location designated SCP-XXX-1.

SCP-XXX-1 takes the form of the subjects home town or a location the subject considers to be their 'home'. This location is populated by civilian entities presumably produced by SCP-XXX-1, which take the form of individuals the subject is familiar with, even if said individuals do not reside in the location being imitated.

For the first seventeen (17) hours of being within SCP-XXX-1, the subject will experience an ordinary day with the exception that every situation the subject finds themselves in will be resolved positively through apparent luck. The subject will typically make amends with civilian entities imitating individuals whom the subject has wronged or been wronged by during this period of time.

After seventeen (17) hours have passed in SCP-XXX-1, the quality of the imitation will begin to rapidly degrade. Effects of this process include, but are not limited to:

• Bizarre and nonsensical situations
• Illogical changes in civilian entity appearance and biology
• Impossible geometry

During the last fifteen (15) minutes of residing in SCP-XXX-1, subjects have recorded the breakdown of physical laws such as gravity, often causing stress and anxiety. After twenty-four (24) hours have passed, all subjects will be forcibly ejected from SCP-XXX-1.

*

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXX is currently contained at Site ██. SCP-XXX is to be contained in a well-lit chamber measuring 6m x 6m and provided with one (1) bovine each month in accordance with Nutrition Chart XXX-1. Each month, SCP-XXX is to be reduced in size by two (2) D-class personnel using shears.

Any personnel entering SCP-XXX's containment chamber must wear a protective suit in order to prevent injury or death.

Description: SCP-XXX is an amorphic mass composed primarily of human bones, large amounts of dust and a form of luminescent fungus which is red in color. SCP-XXX appears to prefer to dwell in dark, warm areas with minimal human presence when it is not hunting or feeding.

SCP-XXX is predatory and highly mobile, having demonstrated the ability to hide from assailants by moving across walls and ceilings. It has a particular method of hunting involving lure tactics, which it has abstained from using since arriving in Foundation custody, although on arrival it did attempt to use provided bovine to lure researchers nearby.

When hunting, SCP-XXX will firstly attempt to lure a human target, usually between the ages of six to twelve, into a fairly secluded area. SCP-XXX accomplishes this by leaving a trail of red, viscous liquid when hunting, which quickly coagulates into a semi-solid edible mass. The area the victim is lured to is usually an easily accessible location that experiences minimal traffic.

Once there, SCP-XXX will settle itself into a poorly-lit area and using a number of hooked barbs stored within its main mass, secure the victim into place.

SCP-XXX will then use a variety of physical methods to incite the victim into vocalizing distress. It accomplishes this using the sharpened bones that make up a section of its mass, and takes great care to ensure that the wounds inflicted are non-fatal, so that this victim can be re-used for further hunting.

Typically, an individual will approach and investigate the vocalizations, at which point SCP-XXX will attack. This attack is usually swift and painless, as SCP-XXX aims for the neck and head of the victim. SCP-XXX will then extract and absorb the bones of the victims into itself.

During its containment, SCP-XXX has been observed to rest on the ceiling of its cell, attempt to damage lights illuminating its containment chamber and to sharpen bones incorporated into itself on the chambers walls.

*

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXX is currently kept in the form of a Common Blackbird chick. SCP-XXX is to be kept in a sealed glass chamber measuring 4m x 4m. This chamber is to contain both SCP-XXX and the 'parent' organisms. SCP-XXX is to be fed daily according to Nutrition Chart XXX-1. (See Incident XXX-1)

SCP-XXX is currently kept in the form of a young Carassius auratus auratus, the domestic goldfish, to minimize difficulties in containment. SCP-XXX is to be contained in a 3m x 3m glass tank with the goldfish it has designated as its 'parent'.

This central tank is to be surrounded by four smaller tanks, each containing one goldfish. In the event that the 'parent' goldfish expire, SCP-XXX will designate one of the surrounding goldfish as its new 'parent', instead of supervising research staff.

SCP-XXX is to be fed as described in Nutritional Chart XXX-2 at least twice a day. No threatening movements are to be made against SCP-XXX (tapping of glass, shaking of tank, etc.) Staff involved in the containment of SCP-XXX are to be cycled out each month.

Description: SCP-XXX is an entity of varying height, weight and species, as it possesses the ability to rapidly change its appearance and biology to match those of any other species. Upon entering an area of three meters around an animal organism, SCP-XXX will designate said organism as its 'parent' and rapidly transform. SCP-XXX will always take the form of a younger member of the organisms species and will remain in this form until either the 'parent' organism is killed or hostilities are engaged against SCP-XXX.

Upon engagement of hostilities, SCP-XXX's face will open outwards. A number of tendrils that appear to be similar in composition to imitated organs will emerge from within the created gap. Using these, SCP-XXX will remove hostiles via a combination of throttling, brute force and lashing. After hostiles are killed or otherwise removed, SCP-XXX will seek out a new 'parent' organism.

SCP-XXX exerts a psychic influence over those designated as its 'parent' organism. The parent will believe that SCP-XXX is their offspring and recall highly detailed memories regarding SCP-XXX's presence. A diminished version of this effect is also exerted on those surrounding SCP-XXX, causing a general sense that SCP-XXX is the genuine offspring of the parent organism. This diminished effect, however, can be overcome with minor concentration and foreknowledge of SCP-XXX's nature.

Incident XXX-1: On ██/██/████, SCP-XXX's 'parent' organisms attacked research personnel during feeding in a manner not consistent with previous behaviour. During the incident, SCP-XXX attempted to breach containment, resulting in the deaths of two (2) security personnel and the injury of Dr. █████. Parent organisms and containment procedures have been altered to make SCP-XXX more manageable.

*

Dr. Tarn Honey/O5-█

Portion of interview between O5-█ and Dr. Tarn Honey, ██/██/████

<Interview Begins>

O5-█: We're almost done here. I hope you do realize your conduct in the cafeteria was highly unprofessional.

Dr. Honey: I was not really thinking of my after-action review at the time, sir.

O5-█: Nevertheless, what did you do next? We've got this bit on camera, but we need you to confirm it.

Dr. Honey: Well, I left the room after maybe…half an hour?

O5-█: Is that an exact number?

Dr. Honey: Forty five minutes? Wait…

Dr. ████: Dr. Honey, please face the camera.

Dr. Honey: Oh…sorry, sorry, don't quite know what came over me there. (Laughs)

O5-█: You left the room?

Dr. Honey: Yes, and I ran right into a man…must have been a D-class, I suppose, with the jumpsuit…holding a fire extinguisher, and then…

O5-█: Yes?

Dr. Honey: I…I don't remember what happened next. I don't remember! What is this, where the hell am I?! Oh [EXPLETIVE], my arms!

Dr. ████: Restrain the subject!

O5-█: My apologies, Dr. Honey. You were beaten to a pulp by the D-class and entered a deep coma. I am very sorry, but you never came out of it.

(O5-█ cuts video-link at this point.)

Dr. Honey: You son of a bitch! You son of a -

<End Interview>

Closing Statement: Instance of SCP-022-1 was removed from the room and expired a week later.

One month before Tempest Night…

A single brown leaf blew through the long-abandoned corridors of Site 17. Skeletons lay in the hallways where they had fell. An alarm blared through the corridors, the person who activated it long dead. Horrors of all shapes and sizes roamed the facility.

For a moment, the wreck that was once civilization was silent.

Then, a small toy robot appeared. Its neck swiveled around, taking in the new and unusual surroundings. It spoke, with a touch of uncertainty in its synthesized voice.

"THANK YOU FOR PURCHASING YOUR VERY OWN ROBO-DUDE, MADE BY DR. WONDERTAINMENT. ANY ATTEMPT TO OPERATE ROBO-DUDE OTHER THAN IN ACCORDANCE WITH THE PRODUCT INSTRUCTIONS, INCLUDING ANY ATTEMPT TO OPEN OR SERVICE ROBO-DUDE IS LIKELY TO RESULT IN UNPREDICTABLE BEHAVIOR. DR. WONDERTAINMENT IS NOT LIABLE FOR ANY DAMAGE, DESTRUCTION OR LOSS OF PERSONAL OR REAL PROPERTY, OR FOR ANY INJURY, UP TO AND INCLUDING DEATH, TO THE OWNER, THE OPERATOR, OR OTHERS WHICH MAY RESULT FROM THE OPERATION OF ROBO-DUDE FUNCTIONS. BY INTERACTING WITH ROBO-DUDE IN ANY WAY OR BY REMAINING IN ROBO-DUDE'S PRESENCE WITHIN FIVE SECONDS FOLLOWING THE COMPLETION OF THIS ANNOUNCEMENT, YOU ACCEPT THE TERMS AND CONDITIONS DESCRIBED IN THIS ANNOUNCEMENT, AS AMENDED AND SUPPLEMENTED BY DR. WONDERTAINMENT FROM TIME TO TIME WHETHER BEFORE OR AFTER ACCEPTANCE, AND AGREE TO HOLD BLAMELESS DR. WONDERTAINMENT, AND EVERYONE AFFILIATED WITH DR. WONDERTAINMENT, FROM AND AGAINST ALL LIABILITY OR LOSSES RELATING TO ROBO-DUDE. DR. WONDERTAINMENT RESERVES ALL RIGHTS AND REMEDIES, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY RIGHTS IN AND TO 'ROBO-DUDE', 'ROBO-PAL', 'ROBO-ACCESSORIES' AND ALL PATENTS, TRADEMARKS, COPYRIGHTS AND OTHER INTELLECTUAL PROPERTIES EMBEDDED OR EMBODIED THEREIN. GREETINGS, ROBO-PAL."

It stopped and realized it was on its own. For the last few years, Robo-Dude could never remember being alone. As a toy, it only remembered what happened when it was turned on. And when it was turned on, Robo-Dude was never alone. It called out now, for the researchers and doctors who had asked it questions and played with it before.

"ROBO-PAL?"

If toys could be surprised, Robo-Dude would be. For a charred corpse was sitting up, burnt flesh replaced with a cold, serious face. It's security uniform became a grey suit. It looked at him for a few seconds, raising a single eyebrow.

What? He said. Who are you?

This Robo-Dude knew!

"I AM ROBO-DUDE, ROBO-PAL. I AM EQUIPPED WITH OVER THREE HUNDRED FUN ACCESSORIES TO MAXIMIZE PLAYTIME ENJOYMENT."

A toy robot? Can robots even dream?

"AFFIRMATIVE, ROBO-PAL. ROBO-DUDE IS FULLY OPTIMIZED FOR NOCTURNAL VIEWING OF CONDUCTIVE LIVESTOCK."

Alright, fine. There's no time to be picky, I need you to -

"ENGAGE IN ROBO-DANCE?"

No, you need to warn -

"ROBO-DUDE IS NOW ENGAGING IN ROBO-DANCE."

Thirty minutes later, Robo-Dude had finished its daily ritual. However, this man was far too old and far too serious to play with toys. Robo-Dude knew that this must be important and stopped dancing one minute early. Some things must be sacrificed for the greater good.

"ROBO-DUDE IS NOW READY FOR INPUT!"

The man smiled with relief and began to speak.

Alright. He said. In one month, Site 17 will be attacked by an enemy force. I can't tell you who they are, I'm sorry, but you must warn them, or horrible things will happen, do you understand?

"ROBO-DUDE UNDERSTANDS THIS MISSION, ROBO-PAL."

Good. Now this dream needs to end. Shake yourself awake or somethi - what are you doing?

Robo-Dude looked up at its new Robo-Pal, its chest open and a small canister emerging from within.

"DEPLOYING ATOMIC GRENADE!"

Hold on, wait, NO -

*

For the first time ever, Robo-Dude activated itself. It had a mission now, it had a purpose! And that purpose was…Robo-Dude was not very clever. In any case, it is hard to remember dreams.

And so, Robo-Dude had forgotten.

Cafeteria Surveillance Log ██/██/████

Doctor T. Honey enters the room. Remains of several researchers and security personnel are present within. T. Honey reacts with shock, then pulls a gun out of a corpses holster.

<T. Honey> Shit, shit, shit…sorry, I'm sorry…

T. Honey takes a seat on the other side of the room, holding his head in his hands. Sounds of somebody approaching are heard. T. Honey takes the gun and holds it to his head.

A. Adams enters the room.

<T. Honey> S-Stay the fuck back! I'll do it, I swear!

<A. Adams> Doctor, put down the gun.

A. Adams steps forward.

<T. Honey> I said back! You won't get me, not me!

<A. Adams> Doctor, I'm not with the attackers. Give me the gun.

<T. Honey> Why exactly should I believe anything you say? Give you my gun, are you crazy? Where's your identification?! I want to see your identification!

A. Adams slides her identification card along the table. T. Honey picks it up and examines it.

<T. Honey> Oh. L-Level 4? Sorry, ma'am, I didn't realize. You can have the gun, I suppose.

T. Honey slides A. Adams' identification and his gun back along the table.

<A. Adams> Right. Now, where is Command and Control?

<T. Honey> Ha. You're new to Level 4, then?

<A. Adams> You could say that.

<T. Honey> Through Decontamination Wing 6, turn left when you reach Protective Materials and keep on going till you hit the doors. Can't miss it.

A. Adams turns to leave.

<T. Honey> Still though, ma'am, hundreds of unholy abominations are loose in the building. You may want to keep that gun close, and I don't mean for defense.

A. Adams leaves the room.

Portion of interview between O5-█ and Dr. Tarn Honey, ██/██/████

O5-█: I'm sorry? You couldn't get back to the containment area?

Dr. Honey: Yes. There were two men there, with guns. I couldn't see their faces, before you ask.

O5-█: Did you at least try -

Dr. Honey: No, I didn't!

(At this point Dr. Honey slammed his hand on the table.)

Dr. Honey: Oh. Oh god, my hands…

Dr. ████: Dr. Honey, please answer O5-█.

Dr. Honey: Of course. Sorry, I must have…must have drifted off there.

O5-█: Understandable. Could you hear the men?

Dr. Honey: I…no, I couldn't hear them properly. They left after a few minutes. At this point, I knew that the area wasn't safe, so I went to the cafeteria. I hoped to find some people.

O5-█: And did you?

Dr. Honey: Not alive.

Portion of interview between O5-█ and Dr. Tarn Honey, ██/██/████

<Interview Begins>

Dr. Honey: I entered the hallway and…and there were just so many bodies.

O5-█: They were security?

Dr. Honey: I suppose they must have been. I didn't know who they were or what had killed them at the time. Of course I now know it was SCP-870. They couldn't have even heard it.

O5-█: A tragic waste of life. Please continue.

Dr. Honey: 737 was there, of course. You know, from the reports you'd imagine it just hits a wall and eats its way through it, but it's more like a maggot. A big, train-shaped, wooden maggot. I should rewrite that report.

O5-█: Perhaps not right now, doctor. You managed to capture 737?

Dr. Honey: It was…it was eating the bodies. At this point it was about seven carriages long. There was no way I could pick that thing up.

O5-█: This is when you hit the alarm?

Dr. Honey: Yes, I -

(At this point, Dr. Honey entered a coughing fit that lasted forty-three seconds, due to the condition at time of interview.)

Dr. Honey: Sorry about (coughs) that. Must be that bug going around!

O5-█: That's alright. Did security arrive?

Dr. Honey: No. I knew at this point something serious was going on. I decided to stay back in 737's containment area. (Laughs) It's not like anyone was using it!

<…>

Portion of interview between O5-█ and Dr. Tarn Honey, ██/██/████.

<Interview Begins>

O5-█: Where were you at the time of the explosions?

Dr. Honey: I was working with SCP-737, sir. I'd come up with a new theory regarding its aversion to copper and -

O5-█: Fascinating, I'm sure, but hardly relevant.

Dr. Honey: No, sir. Well, I was knocked unconscious by the explosion, as the security footage clearly shows.

O5-█: Of course.

Dr. Honey: When I came to, 737 had gone. I was inside the observation chamber, so it hadn't seen me, but the guard…oh god. C-can I have a moment?

O5-█: I'm afraid I must ask you to continue, doctor.

Dr. Honey: That train had just tunneled right through his head. There was blood everywhere, and there was a suspiciously train-shaped hole in the wall.

O5-█: And what did you do next?

Dr. Honey: I went after it, of course. I thought security would be busy with the explosion, so I grabbed a sheet of copper from the emergency
locker and went looking. I thought the explosion was just a minor containment breach. I didn't think it was that bad.

O5-█: Understandable.

Dr. Honey: As I was saying, I walked out of SCP-737's containment area and into the neighboring hallway. I spotted it turning around a corner and followed. I was all ready to grab it, but…oh god, I really need a minute.

(O5-█ sighs.)

O5-█: Of course. Take your time.

<…>

Ah, hello there.

No, don't get up. Put down the gun, it won't do anything. You can't shoot what isn't properly real. See, isn't that much nicer? All friends. Face that window, please. Oh, and smile. There, that's good.

You look surprised, doctor. You've been on a binge of me, haven't you? I like your style, you fall down and you just get back up! Shame though, that's what let me in. Nice couch. Don't get up, I'll make myself at home. What are you talking about, doctor? Oh, no, I've not come here as some sort of vengeful retribution. I really don't mind you people watching me, although I do wish you'd share them. You're very selfish, taking me away from the children like that, you know.

I admit I did lose my temper for a bit back there, didn't I? Don't worry, I've come to terms with my new audience. You do let me at children quite often. Some people would call you monsters! Not me, I don't judge. I'm fair.

Haha, what are you writing? I'm very sorry, doctor, but this isn't an interview. I'd put it in the trash. There we go. Everything goes in the trash eventually. You trash your precious interview, the children trash their little minds and even I had to trash some of my other gimmicks. Oh, yes. I've been making little savages for quite a while now, doctor. Put down the gun.

I think I started off small, the idea of fire some stupid cavemen got into their skulls. Children didn't really have time for me back then, so I moved on. The skinwalker shtick though, that was a good idea. Children whispered about me in the dark, adults even painted me! I hardly had to do anything at all!

But then you had to get clever, didn't you? Suddenly all those superstitions started to float away and I had no children to help, no parents to…well, you'll find out soon enough. And yet, there was one little form that I had left, one fun-loving character that could still reach inside those kids heads and twist. I'm talking, of course, about Bobble the Clown. Oh, don't look so glum.

Smile. You're on television!

As of ██/██/20██, it appears SCP-993 has ceased broadcasting.

On ██/██/20██, SCP-993 has resumed its normal broadcasting. Re-classification to Euclid is being considered.

Episode Title

Contents

'Bobble's Back!'

Setting of episode appears to be Dr. █████'s office. Bobble and Dr. █████ appear to converse for fifteen minutes, although no dialogue is audible. Fifteen minutes in, Dr. █████ raises a pistol and fires upon Bobble to no effect. Bobble then systematically dismembers and removes facial extremities from Dr. █████ using a large butchers knife. Signs of movement are visible from Dr. █████ for three minutes, after which the credits roll. Alarmingly, Dr. █████ disappeared without a trace a day before the episode broadcasted.

*

Item #: SCP-362-J

Object Class: Amazing

Special Containment Procedures: Each morning, all staff members must congregate at Site ██'s parking lot and observe Dr. ████ arriving in SCP-362-J. During this process, Dr. ████ must be complimented on his physical attractiveness and on the abilities and appearance of SCP-362-J.

Dr. ████ must wear tinted glasses during this procedure in order to maximize its effectiveness. When the procedure is concluded, explosive pyrotechnic devices must be launched in order to indicate this.

Only Dr. ████ is authorized to operate SCP-362-J.

Description: SCP-362-J is a blue sports car recently purchased by Dr. ███ ████'s wife as a gift for his birthday. Dr. ████ soon realized that SCP-362-J

*

Addendum 2000-J-1: SCP-2000-J recently requested that Agent ████ become romantically involved with it. Agent ████ denied this request as she is currently in a steady relationship with the leader of Mobile Task Force Zeta-9 ("The Jocks").

Addendum 2000-J-2: Due to SCP-2000-J's difficulties in interacting with female staff members and physical abuse by several humanoid SCP's, the decision has been made to insert SCP-2000-J into the Foundation's Basketball Team in hopes of finally winning against the Global Occult Coalition.

Addendum 2000-J-3: SCP-2000-J has recently assembled an improved team to represent the Foundation, consisting of several researchers, Agents and humanoid SCP's.

Addendum 2000-J-4: On ██/██/20███, SCP-2000-J approached Dr. █████, requesting that he join Athletic Task Force Alpha-11. Due to Dr. █████'s unpleasant history involving the game, he refused, advising SCP-2000-J to cease playing basketball before it experiences a similar negative experience.

Addendum 2000-J-5: The Foundation-GOC annual basketball tournament is currently underway. Updates are pending.

Addendum 2000-J-6: Astonishingly, Dr. █████ has attended the game and is assisting Athletic Task Force Alpha-11. SCP-2000-J appears to register satisfaction at this development.

Addendum 2000-J-7: One of the members of the GOC team has terminated Dr. █████ with a concealed pistol. The GOC player has been removed from the game by Assistant Referee ███████. During the mid-game break, SCP-2000-J expressed determination to win the game.

Addendum 2000-J-8: SCP-2000-J has gained possession of the ball and is rapidly approaching the GOC hoop and YES HE MADE THE SHOT YESSSS

Addendum 2000-J-9: SCP-2000-J is currently in a steady relationship with Agent ████. Termination of Agent ████ for unprofessional behaviour is under consideration.

*

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: When not under controlled observation, SCP-XXX is to be kept in cold storage at Sector-██. SCP-XXX is to be kept one(1) mile from any concentrated group of animals considered livestock at all times.

When under controlled observation, a perimeter is to be established outside the observation area and research is to cease immediately in the event of an attempted containment breach. Ten (10) members of security are to be present during controlled observation to enforce this. Controlled observation must be approved by one (1) member of Level 4 personnel.

Description: SCP-XXX is an aged scarecrow outfitted with a tattered coat and hat, measuring three (3) meters tall and ten (10) centimeters wide. SCP-XXX is composed of standard wood, splinters of which have not displayed its anomalous properties.

When animals considered livestock (sheep, cows, chickens etc.) enter the area within a mile of SCP-XXX, they are immediately affected by its anomalous properties. SCP-XXX affected animals are extremely hostile to humans and will viciously assault any who approach them. Affected animals have been observed to utilize advanced maneuvers such as flanking and ambushing.

Affected animals have also been observed to behave as if in an automated farm environment. Chickens will lay their eggs in easy to access areas and sheep will attempt to remove wool from each other using their teeth. Cows have been observed to kill one (1) cow each week and roughly separate its carcass into strips of meat.

Each month, the animals will transport anything produced to the perimeter of SCP-XXX's area of influence and allow humans to remove it from the area.

When removed from SCP-XXX's area of influence, affected animals experience immediate brain-death. Brain functions return when the animal is moved back into SCP-XXX's area of influence.

History: SCP-XXX was first discovered in the Russian countryside during the Cold War and caused much distress to the Soviet government, who believed SCP-XXX's effects were the results of an American weapon. Foundation Agents managed to secure the item and transport it to Sector-██ before hostilities could ensue.

*

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Keter

Special Containment Procedures: Any photographs or individuals compromised by SCP-XXX are to be removed from their location and incinerated immediately. No photographs affected by SCP-XXX are to be brought into contact with other photographs. For research purposes, one photograph affected by SCP-XXX is currently kept in a sealed chamber.

Suspected 'carrier' photographs of SCP-XXX are to be brought into Foundation custody and investigated.

Description: SCP-XXX is a phenomenon similar in activity to a virus or disease. SCP-XXX appears to spread exclusively through photographs

SCP-001 proposal 1 (nah)

WELCOME BACK, USER O51-OHQ-LR

YOU HAVE ONE NEW MESSAGE

open message

Message from Dr. Cassidy to O5-1

Here are those old 001 files you requested, sir. Got a touch of nostalgia? I hope you find what you're looking for, at any rate.

open file SCP-001 (outdated)

OPENING FILE SCP-001 (outdated)

Initially filed July 12th, 1913

THIS FILE IS PROPERTY OF THE EXTRANORMAL DEFENSE AGENCY. UNAUTHORIZED VIEWING OF THIS FILE IS GROUNDS FOR PROSECUTION. THANK YOU.

EDA-012: Pheromone Exuding Fauna

Threat Level: Black - Grey - White - Yellow - Orange - Red

Threat Type: Cognitohazardous

Escape Possibility: None

Detainment Protocols: EDA-012 is currently held at Detainment Base Gamma. All staff attempting to access EDA-012 must possess BF-Clearance. As a secondary precaution, staff accessing EDA-012 must have written permission from a CC-Clearance staff member. Staff entering the detainment cell must be equipped with one (1) Biohazard Inhibitor Mask at all times.

All staff leaving EDA-012's detainment cell must be interviewed by a Detainment Enforcer possessing AL-Clearance. If the Detainment Enforcer determines that said staff member has been affected by EDA-012, staff member will be held in Enforcement custody for twenty four (24) hours and administered one (1) specimen of EDA-045 ("Mentally Regenerating Oligochetes") to clear influence from their system.

Physical Description: EDA-012 is a specimen of Helianthus annuus, the common sunflower. No physical abnormalities are present in its external structure. A noticeable opaque gas is noticeably emitting from its petals. Affected individuals report gas as smelling similar to strawberries. EDA-012 appears to have minor regenerative abilities, and has not aged since its discovery by Operative Howitzer.

Effect Description: The gas which EDA-012 emits is a pheromone specifically tailored to affect the brains of advanced primates, such as humans or chimpanzees. Diminished reactions to EDA-012's pheromone has been noted in chimpanzee's, suggesting its primary target is humans.

Upon exposure to the pheromone, affected individuals become obsessed with 'changing the world', usually by attempting to influence global events. Extended exposure to EDA-012 causes breakdown of morality in the affected individual. Affected individuals will continue attempting to 'change the world', but their methods will become much less legitimate.

This second phase of exposure can and has resulted in:

• Assassinations
• Murders
• Bombings
• Treason
• Attempted violation of Detainment Protocols

Method of Destruction (if required): Incineration and scattering of ashes to prevent full reconstitution.

Additional Materials:

Excerpt from the journal of Dr. L Robinson

Research on EDA-012 is proceeding well, despite the controversy among staff. Operative Smith somehow got exposed to it last week and tried to breach detainment of EDA-058 ("Hostile Biblical Figure"). It cut him in half with that damn sword, of course, but it also got twenty three Detainment Enforcers. Now the rest of staff wants 012 burnt. Why must everyone on this base be so unprofessional?

Memo from Dr. L Robinson to Director Claustrophobia-1

Sir, could you please persuade Director Vertigo-3 to reconsider his order of destruction on EDA-012? It is completely harmless, I assure you, and we can learn much from its pheromone. sunflower

Your loyal servant, Dr. Robinson.

Memo from Director Claustrophobia-1 to Dr. L Robinson

Certainly, Doctor. I will try my best. dandelion

Director Claustrophobia-1

Log of Extranormal Defense Agency Activity, January 2^nd 1956

12:16: Director Claustrophobia-1 detained for subordinance and attempted murder of Director Vertigo-3.

12:32: Execution/destruction of all viable EDA's ordered.

12:56: Destruction of EDA-092 successful. Execution of EDA-003 successful. Execution of EDA-058 unsuccessful, EDA-058b sealed at designated location without incident.

13:02: Destruction of EDA-001 partially successful, resultant detonation results in destruction of Detainment Base Zeta and all associated EDA's.

13:32: Destruction/execution of EDA's 077 to 122 successful via mass incineration.

14:21: EDA-012 and Doctor Lawrence Robinson reported missing.

Speech made by Doctor Lawrence Robinson to assorted military personnel and researchers on July 15^th, 1958

Thank you all for coming tonight. I trust we have all brought what was agreed upon, yes? Did you manage to retrieve the skeleton key, Bowe?

…

Ah, thank you, thank you. Shouldn't be too hard to contain. Certainly safe.

…

We are here tonight so that humanity can explain the unexplained. It is our right, our privilege. We have charted all corners of the globe, explored every continent, every nation. It is only right that there is more to explore. Our former Director Vertigo would have us destroy them. I offer a different method.

…

Contain them. It is simple. Most of these items we have managed to save from the Defense Agency as it crashed and burned could be simply put in a box and tidied away. We would be free to research them, to test them, at our leisure.

…

I have heard rumors among our little group that I have simply been sitting in my little hidey hole, cowering from Vertigo's new organisation. What is it he calls it, the Global Occult Coalition? How droll. I suggest we establish a competing organisation. We will secure these objects, contain them from the public, and protect them from danger.

…

This dream of mine is bigger than any of us. If we agree to this, we won't need names any more, we won't be people anymore. We will be watchful guardians of humanity, keeping these objects hidden until the world is ready for them.

…

I will ask you, at the end of the evening, whether you wish to join my Foundation. Please enjoy the dinner.

close file

CLOSING FILE SCP-001 (outdated)

compose message

PLEASE COMPOSE YOUR MESSAGE

Message O5-1 to Mary Denholm

I will require my sunflower watering later today, Ms. Denholm.

order termination robert cassidy

ORDER SENT

log off

*

Brownies

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXX is currently contained at Site ██, in ██████. SCP-XXX specimens are to be contained in a 6m x 6m chamber with no furniture. All personnel entering SCP-XXX's containment chamber are to wear hazmat suits. Hazmat suits are to be checked for ruptures before and after entering the containment chamber.

In the event of a suit breach, compromised personnel are to be removed from the area and detained for twenty four (24) hours. SCP-XXX is to be provided with one (1) liter of milk each day.

Description: SCP-XXX is a species of insect similar in appearance to a bee or a wasp. Specimens of SCP-XXX are typically colored red and black, although variations in this have been noted among their populace. SCP-XXX usually breed and live in human residences, but sightings of SCP-XXX have been reported at rivers and lakes, suggesting the possible existence of a subspecies.

SCP-XXX operates with a typical social system; a queen is always present in the center of the nest and reproduces constantly. SCP-XXX queens are recognizable from the distinctive yellow spot present on their backs.

SCP-XXX nests are usually formed in a section of the human residence with little traffic, such as an attic or basement. SCP-XXX have been observed to operate at all times of the day, and are typically dismissed by residents as ordinary bees or wasps. When a nest has been formed, specimens of SCP-XXX will attempt to sting residents, injecting them with hallucinogenic venom. SCP-XXX will sting their victims at least once per day.

When injected with the venom, victims of SCP-XXX will perceive SCP-XXX as small humanoid figures with wings and believe that SCP-XXX are assisting with the maintenance of the residence. Victims will continue to believe this even if the residence undergoes structural collapse. Victims of SCP-XXX will attempt to defend SCP-XXX if they are threatened, seemingly abandoning all sense of self-preservation in the process. SCP-XXX appears to only sting humans, and will not undergo the symbiotic relationship with other species.

SCP-XXX will eat nearly every organic substance, with a particular affinity to milk. Consumption of milk seems to be remedial to SCP-XXX. Injuries such as torn wings and missing legs have been observed to heal in a matter of hours after consumption of milk by SCP-XXX. As SCP-XXX are voracious eaters and will typically consume all food products in the residence over a matter of days, such a process usually ends in the victim or victims unknowingly succumbing to malnutrition. At this point, SCP-XXX will consume the victims corpse and migrate to a new residence.

*

Object #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXX is to be stored in Storage Unit ██ when not in use. SCP-XXX is to be kept in a sealed safe and the Storage Unit is to be guarded by one (1) member of security at all times. Unauthorized researchers are not to be allowed access to SCP-XXX.

Activation of SCP-XXX must be authorized by at least two (2) Level 4 personnel.

Description: SCP-XXX is, in its original state, a 1948 Push-Button telephone, with the addition of three buttons on the back of the unit. The buttons read 'On', 'Stop' 'Back'. These buttons are a constant between SCP-XXX's various forms.

SCP-XXX requires electricity to utilize its anomalous properties or function as a regular telephone. However, when using its anomalous properties, it appears to also absorb energy from its surroundings. Internal analysis of SCP-XXX shows no differences from an ordinary telephone from that era.

When the 'On' button of SCP-XXX is used, SCP-XXX will activate and quickly change its external and internal structure, progressing along a timeline of phone models which changes with each activation. During this time, SCP-XXX will absorb energy from its environment, causing the temperature to plummet to and stabilize at ██°C. Pressing 'Back' will return SCP-XXX to its original state and 'Stop' will 'pause' SCP-XXX.

Each time SCP-XXX 'evolves', it enters a liquid state and quickly reshapes itself into a new form, then solidify.

Testing Log

Test XXX-1
Result: SCP-XXX progresses through several known models of phones and eventually begins taking on organic qualities. At time of deactivation, SCP-XXX has taken the form of a pulsating organ similar in composition to the human brain.

Test XXX-2
Result: SCP-XXX progresses through several known models of phones and begins to rapidly decompose. SCP-XXX then reforms into a primitive machine which begins expanding. This form of SCP-XXX appears to be formed from broken parts of other machines. At time of deactivation, SCP-XXX filled the whole testing chamber.

Test XXX-3
Result: SCP-XXX progresses through several known models of phones, then progresses through several unknown models. At time of deactivation, SCP-XXX is a small device resembling a needle.

Test XXX-4
Result: SCP-XXX progresses through several known models of phones, decomposes as in Text XXX-2, then reforms as a small spider. When SCP-XXX is told to deliver a message, it moves to the person specified and repeats the message in a manner similar to that of a parrot.

Test XXX-5
Result: SCP-XXX progresses through several known models of phones and stops at a modern day mobile phone. At time of deactivation, it had still not deviated from this form.

*

Object #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: Any broadcasts of SCP-XXX are to be intercepted and blocked from public viewing. All intercepted broadcasts are to be recorded and stored for future viewing. Any subjects used to view SCP-XXX are to be dosed with a Class A amnesiac after they have described the episode.

Viewing of SCP-XXX must be authorized by three (3) Level 4 personnel.

Description: SCP-XXX is a children's television program entitled "Bobble the Clown'. SCP-XXX seems to have been made in the style of an educational cartoon, with the primary plot of most episodes being the titular character, Bobble the Clown, learning a new skill or activity. The program appears to have no supporting cast and the setting of the program often changes between episodes.

SCP-XXX's anomalous properties become obvious when the program is viewed. Anyone watching above the age of ten will immediately fall unconscious when the program begins and will remain incapacitated until the end of the program, later reporting a stabbing headache immediately before blacking out.

Children under the age of ten viewing SCP-XXX later report that it teaches and advocates activities such as cannibalism, murder, torture, [DATA EXPUNGED]. These activities appear to become ingrained in the subjects mind and repeated exposure to SCP-XXX can result in permanent psychosis and schizophrenia.

Episodes of SCP-XXX are regularly broadcast from a currently unknown source, but all broadcasts to date have been successfully intercepted and blocked from public viewing.

Object #: SCP-XXX

Object Class:

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXX is to be staffed by ten (10) Biological Containment Personnel at all times. Flamethrowers are to be kept on location at all times and are to be used in the event of nearby properties becoming infected.

Any civilians inquiring about SCP-XXX's level of security are to be informed that the area has been quarantined as a result of a radiation leak. In the event of extended inquiry on the part of civilians, concerned individuals are to be brought into custody and dosed with a Class A amnesiac.

Description: SCP-XXX is a dilapidated three-story residence in the small town of ███████. Two (2) slightly decomposed corpses are present inside SCP-XXX, one male and one female. The male corpse shows signs of blunt trauma to the head and neck, and severe lacerations are present on the right leg. The female corpse shows signs of strangulation and blunt trauma to the ribs.

Present on a table within SCP-XXX's kitchen is a glass of carbonated soda, since gone flat. A fruit bowl on the same table contains a slightly rotted apple. The bottom right leg of the table has snapped and been replaced with an iron pole, crudely attached to the table using nails.

Present in the dining room of SCP-XXX is a slightly torn portrait of a sunflower. The stairs leading to the second floor of SCP-XXX are slightly damaged and the third step has completely collapsed. Signs of termite infestation are evident inside SCP-XXX.

Present within SCP-XXX are an unidentified form of microorganism, hereafter referred to as SCP-XXX-1. SCP-XXX-1 has infested all surfaces inside SCP-XXX, and is also present within all liquids in the residence. Since the SCP-XXX-1 infestation, SCP-XXX has shown no further structural collapse and all biological tissue within SCP-XXX has ceased decomposing.

SCP-XXX-1 reproduces quickly and has on multiple occasions infested other properties in the area. Upon infestation of a residence, SCP-XXX-1 will proceed to replicate SCP-XXX's conditions. SCP-XXX-1 will infest any humans in the residence, usually killing them by tunneling through their heart. SCP-XXX-1 will then proceed to systematically injure the corpse.

In the case of males, SCP-XXX-1 will replicate blunt trauma to the head and neck, and will tunnel through the right leg to create severe lacerations. In the case of females, SCP-XXX-1 will apply precise trauma to simulate strangulation and blunt trauma to the ribs. If there are more humans residing in the infested residence than SCP-XXX, any additional corpses within the infested residence will be broken down extremely quickly, until no evidence of its existence remains. SCP-XXX-1 within victims bodies will, through a process as of yet unknown, alter its DNA until is identical to the corresponding body within SCP-XXX.

Any carbonated liquids within SCP-XXX will go flat and fruit will rot to a certain point, and then cease decomposition completely. SCP-XXX-1 will convert the bottom right leg of any table within an infested residence to iron, and produce nails identical to those in SCP-XXX. Any paintings, portraits or photographs within the infested residence will be converted to a slightly torn painting of a sunflower.

If residences infested by SCP-XXX-1 possess a second floor, the third step will be tunneled through and made to collapse. SCP-XXX-1 will produce live termites within the walls until the residence can be considered infested. SCP-XXX-1 will tunnel through surfaces until they have reached a similar state of collapse as SCP-XXX.

Removing objects from SCP-XXX appears to have no affect on this conversion process, as it would seem SCP-XXX-1 is operating on a 'template' of SCP-XXX's state when it was first infested. SCP-XXX-1 has proved vulnerable to heat, and use of flamethrowers is advised to deal with infected residences.

Object #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXX is to be contained in a reinforced steel safe, located in Storage Unit █ at Site ██. SCP-XXX's containment area is to be guarded by three (3) security personnel at all times. Any unauthorized personnel attempting to access SCP-XXX are to be taken into custody and interrogated by on-site security.

Activation of SCP-XXX must be authorized by at least three (3) Level 4 personnel. Any testing of SCP-XXX is to take place at an on-site firing range.

Description: SCP-XXX is a plastic toy robot measuring twenty (20) centimeters in height and five (5) centimeters in width. The bottom of SCP-XXX's right foot bears the text 'Robo-Dude® (Now with Voice Command Action), by Dr. Wondertainment!' Signs of paint chipping and minor damage to SCP-XXX indicate that it is roughly ten (10) years old, although attempts to question SCP-XXX on this have been ignored. (See Interview XXX-1)

SCP-XXX is operated using a small 'controller' featuring an 'On/Off' button ,a 'Speak' button and a small microphone. SCP-XXX is activated using the 'On/Off' button, and verbal communication can be facilitated using the 'Speak' button. SCP-XXX appears to be extremely well programmed, if not sentient, and will respond to most questions posed to it.

SCP-XXX identifies itself as 'Robo-Dude' and claims that it possesses three hundred and fifty (350) 'Robo-Accessories'. When asked to use one of these accessories, the torso of SCP-XXX slides open, revealing the desired accessory, which it then proceeds to utilize. The interior of SCP-XXX appears to change completely each time it is asked to utilize an accessory. SCP-XXX seems to be unable to utilize these accessories without being instructed to do so.

SCP-XXX has claimed to possess, among other things:

• A 'Fire Drill'. (Tested, functioned as a flamethrower.)
• An 'Energy Laser' (Tested, functioned as a pistol.)
• A 'Boom Ray' (Tested, functioned as an rocket launcher.)
• A 'Melt-o-Tron 5000' (Tested, sprayed acid at target)
• An 'Ultra Plasma Rifle' (Tested, functioned as an assault rifle)
• A 'Hydrogen Cannon' (Tested, functioned as a children's water gun)
• 'Bug Spray' (Tested, released unidentified organisms that consumed the wooden target, then died.)
• A 'Ray Gun' (Tested, released a stream of gamma radiation)
• An 'Atomic Grenade' (Testing strictly forbidden.)

History: SCP-XXX was brought into containment after an unknown individual delivered it in a sealed package to [REDACTED], a front company for the SCP Foundation. The label of the package simply read 'MERRY CHRISTMAS', and Agents, upon learning of SCP-XXX's unusual properties, informed their superiors. SCP-XXX was subsequently taken into Foundation custody.

*

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXX is to be contained in a sealed chamber measuring 8m x 8m. Motion sensors are to be placed in the containment area and movements of SCP-XXX are to be monitored at all times.

A motion activated turret is to be placed directly outside the containment area to prevent the escape of SCP-XXX. One (1) D-class personnel suffering from schizophrenia is to observe SCP-XXX via camera at all times.

SCP-XXX is to be provided with one (1) bovine carcass every forty-eight (48) hours.

Description: SCP-XXX is an animal species of undetermined proportions and appearance, which, for unknown reasons, can only be perceived by individuals suffering from schizophrenia. This often results in specimens of SCP-XXX being dismissed as hallucinations. Specimens of SCP-XXX are omnivorous and seem to eat nearly all kinds of plants and meat.

No two people with the ability to perceive SCP-XXX describe it's appearance in the same way. Individuals have described SCP-XXX as:

• An alligator with spider legs and three eyes.
• A man made out of smoke.
• A giant ant with a human face.
• A hunchbacked child with a parrots head.

Specimens of SCP-XXX are highly predatory, and will typically stalk their prey for months and years without eating. It is unknown how they manage to last this time without succumbing to malnutrition. Eventually, at a seemingly random time, they will kill their prey and subsequently swallow it whole.

SCP-XXX's method of reproduction is currently unknown, but the journal of schizophrenic researcher ██████ ████ speculates that they do not actually require sustenance to survive, and instead re-purpose the body of their victim into their young over a large period of time.

The specimen of SCP-XXX currently in Foundation custody frequently attempts to breach containment, and has proven hostile to all personnel. Research is ongoing to find a way to perceive SCP-XXX without being schizophrenic, but this may take some time.

It is currently believed that there could be hundreds, if not thousands, of SCP-XXX in the wild. They are a clear and present danger to the public, and steps must be taken to destroy or contain the species.

*

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: The area known as SCP-XXX is to be contained behind two (2) meter tall electrical fencing. Motion activated turrets are to be placed within the area in order to prevent any instances of SCP-XXX-1 from escaping the containment area. No liquids are allowed within the area known as SCP-XXX.

Any civilians approaching SCP-XXX are to be interrogated and subsequently dosed with Class-A amnesiacs. For the sake of secrecy, SCP-XXX is to be represented as a military base on all maps of the area, and any satellite imaging is to be doctored by dedicated staff to represent the area as such.

Any personnel entering SCP-XXX are to wear sealed ventilated pressure suits to prevent liquid coming into contact with SCP-XXX. These suits are to be checked for ruptures before entering SCP-XXX. Any instances of SCP-XXX-1

Description: SCP-XXX is a an area of land spanning five square kilometers located in the ██████ Desert, referred to by locals as 'The Kingdom of Sand'. Unidentified radio interference is present within SCP-XXX, with the source currently unknown.

SCP-XXX demonstrates a further anomalous property when sand within the area comes into contact with any type of liquid. The moisturized sand will animate, typically taking the shape of an animal proportionate to the amount of sand moisturized. These entities will hereafter be referred to as SCP-XXX-1.

Instances of SCP-XXX-1 will behave aggressively to any lifeforms that enter SCP-XXX, and will attack on sight. SCP-XXX-1 will typically 'hunt' their prey and have on several occasions followed intruders out of SCP-XXX-1 and to nearby towns.

Instances of SCP-XXX-1 do not appear to attack each other, and instead behave in a hive mind, using flanking maneuvers to distract and kill their victims. SCP-XXX-1 typically collapse after twenty four hours, although this timescale seems to be longer in smaller instances.

Sand retrieved from SCP-XXX appears to retain its anomalous qualities until it is taken six (6) miles away from SCP-XXX. Taking advantage of this, a research outpost has been established two (2) miles away from SCP-XXX, and research on the anomalous sand is currently being undertaken.

Analysis of the radio interference and evidence given in Interview XXX-1 indicate that the source of the anomalous events is the center of SCP-XXX. However, all attempts to reach it have met with failure.

History: SCP-XXX was discovered by the Foundation during a routine myth verification operation undertaken by Task Force Zeta-17 "Beach Bullies". Contact was lost with Task Force Zeta-17 one (1) hour after the mission began.

Mobile Task Force Phi-22 "Well Wishers" then began a rescue operation and managed to retrieve ██████ █████, the leader of Mobile Task Force Zeta-17 and only survivor of the incident, on the outskirts of SCP-XXX, who informed research staff of SCP-XXX's nature.

*

Item #: SCP-XXX

Object Class: Safe

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-XXX is currently contained at Sector-28, located on █████████ ██████ SCP-XXX is to be contained in a 6m x 6m holding cell, monitored by surveillance cameras at all times. SCP-XXX is to be provided with five (5) litres of each primary color of paint each day, along with twenty-four (24) standard painting canvas'. All paintings created by SCP-XXX are to be recorded by research staff.

In the event that SCP-XXX attempts to destroy itself, security personnel are to restrain SCP-XXX and await further orders from Research Staff present.

Description: SCP-XXX is a highly advanced automaton approximately ten (10) inches across, six (6) inches wide and eight (8) inches tall. SCP-XXX possesses two (2) pincer-like limbs protruding from its main circular body, which it uses to slowly move itself across the ground. This is due to SCP-XXX's locomotive functions having been damaged at an unknown point in its history.

At the center of SCP-XXX's body is a red 'eye' similar in appearance to that of the human retina. This eye is also damaged, leaving SCP-XXX partially blind. A 'Marshall, Carter and Dark Ltd.' logo has been stamped onto SCP-XXX's back. Interior analysis of SCP-XXX has determined that SCP-XXX moves using a rudimentary nervous system, coordinated by a one (1) inch large spherical 'brain'.

SCP-XXX's primary purpose appears to be the creation of paintings. Paintings produced by SCP-XXX are highly realistic and often do not correspond to real locations. Recently, paintings created by SCP-XXX have all mostly involved, in some way, SCP-XXX's death. SCP-XXX was initially sold to Marshall, Carter and Dark Ltd by an unknown individual. When Marshall, Carter and Dark Ltd. executives discovered SCP-XXX was damaged, they were reported as being most displeased. ██████ ██████, a Foundation mole within the organisation, was able to retrieve SCP-XXX before incineration.

SCP-XXX usually produces one (1) painting per hour. When SCP-XXX is not provided with adequate paint or painting canvas', it appears to enter a dormant state, shutting down for a minimum time length of one (1) week. As this heavily impedes research, SCP-XXX is to be kept stocked with paint and canvas' at all times.