Wrong Said Fred

There is a room. There is a chair in the room, with leather restraints. Locked into the chair is a man named Fred. He is the only man named Fred anywhere. There is no one else in the world named Fred, or Ford, or Mr. Frederick, or anything even remotely like Fred.

"What are you doing?" asks Fred.

Another man is in the room. It's Doctor Kerce. "Hello, Fred," he says.

"Let me out," Fred says, struggling against his restraints. All attempts he makes to free himself are useless.

"In good time," says Doctor Kerce. "I want to talk to you, Fred."

"We can talk in the Journal." Fred glares at his captor.

"Don't worry, Fred. This is just a little experiment," Doctor Kerce explains. He has a set of surgical tools.

"I don't like this experiment," Fred says.

Doctor Kerce pulls out a knife, and cuts Fred on the arm. "Did you feel that?" he asks.

"Yes!" Fred says, as the blood began to stain his sleeve.

"Interesting," says Doctor Kerce. He bandages the incision, then pulls out a syringe.

Fred struggles again, trying to make it more difficult for Kerce to use the syringe. However, the restraints are too tight for him to resist effectively.

"I wouldn't, if I were you," Doctor Kerce says. "I can do other things to keep you from wriggling."

Fred reluctantly stops moving.

"Good, good." Doctor Kerce uses the syringe to take a blood sample. He walks to the counter, where he has blood typing equipment set up. He begins to work.

"Why are you doing this?" Fred asks.

"Because it occurred to me that I could," says Doctor Kerce. He completes the blood typing. The blood is type O positive. "I was right," he says. "Provided the proper stimulus, information about SCP-423 appears spontaneously in the narrative."

"What's your point?" asks Fred.

"You'll see. First, let's try another test." Doctor Kerce pulls out a jar. The jar contains an infinite number of SCP-500. He gives one to Fred.

Fred heals instantly.

"There, you see?" Kerce says. "No permanent harm done. No matter what happens, we can always restore you. It's only a story, after all." He pulls open a drawer and removes a jar. "A sample of SCP-306. We'll just see how this affects you, shall we?" He taps the jar, and a small, hard object falls out on Fred's hand.

Fred jerks his hand, knocking the small object away.

"That should be enough," says Kerce. "Now we wait."

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